How to clear out your clutter and move on!
Planning a move or simply want to get rid of stuff? SUE HANCOCK explains how she began a business to help people who can’t say goodbye to their possessions
THE idea for The Moving Planner came after my own experience with bereavement, tackling redundancy, downsizing and the perils of storage. I stood in my parents’ house after my father’s death in January 2000, looked around and thought, “I had no idea that my parents didn’t throw anything away”. My mother had died of cancer in 1988 and mostly my father had left the house exactly as it was then.
I was going through a chest of drawers and found my mother’s knitting, half finished, that had sat in a drawer untouched for 12 years. Where to begin and what to keep? I felt very alone and lost.
My parents were of the generation that did everything formally. It was a family home. There were four different sets of china, knife and fork sets, fish knives and forks, decanters, coasters and glasses for every type of drink you would ever possibly want.
I had always thought I would like a cottage in the country. A bit of a fantasy as there was no way I was going to be able to afford it on my salary. A girl can dream though and it was a way out of my current dilemma. I can keep this and that for the cottage, I thought… the worst possible decision that one was. I made up boxes and boxes of things to keep for my “next house”, labelled all the furniture and sent the whole lot to storage.
So it was 2005 and everything was still sitting in a warehouse next to Heathrow, collecting a lot of dust and of course costing a fortune. Still no sign of the cottage in the country so I thought I had better have a clear-out. But I still kept a lot “just in case”.
In 2008 I was taking voluntary redundancy from my work at a TV company. I got a good package and shot off to America on a road trip. I thought that when I came back I could work as a consultant for people starting up their own production companies. I was in New York on September 29, 2008, turned on the TV and the stock market had just crashed.
BACK in London I found that the recession had hit the TV industry like every other industry. After 35 years of working in television I couldn’t get a job.
It was a dark period in my life when I lost all self confidence, spent all my savings trying to cheer myself up and lived as I had when I was working. I had gone from being a professional person to an underearner. I was paralysed by indecision, fear and lack of self worth. I realised that in order to survive I had to start a second career.
Eventually I sold everything in storage. It was such a relief after so long. It had also cost me £38,000.
This made me think that there must be so many people out there like me, in particular women on their own who don’t have the time or are in emotional pain because of redundancy, bereavement, divorce or just having to downsize, who don’t feel able to do it alone.
I am an extreme example but I thought perhaps by sharing my experience I could work with others and be a support. So I started working with women (mainly) who needed to downsize and I helped them work through their memories and come out the other side.
One woman, a film marketing executive, had become unexpectedly disabled. Very successful, a widow with one very busy daughter, she had travelled all over the world doing her job and had quite a collection of items and memorabilia. Her four-bedroom house, loft and garage were packed to the brim. She was moving to a twobedroom flat. She was in physical pain as well as having to experience the emotional pain of letting go of her home of 30 years, full of memories of her husband. She got through it and it was immensely satisfying to see her rehoused in her new home.
ANOTHER client, 82, just didn’t want to go through the process of moving alone. She had two grown-up daughters, one in New York and the other super busy with a new business and she really needed support. Her walking had deteriorated and she found it very hard going through all her belongings but she was tenacious and got there. A bonus is that a lot of furniture went to auction and raised enough to pay for her moving expenses. Both women were fearful of the change they were about to make. We are creatures of habit, especially when older, and both women wanted everything to stay the same because they felt safe.
My job is facilitation and to focus my clients on moving forward. I help them take action and make decisions. I don’t tell anyone they have to get rid of anything. I merely suggest and try to keep the endgame for them in sight when they are having trouble managing their time and emotions. If they are ambivalent about a cushion their daughter made I would suggest they take a photo of it to keep but discard the cushion.
When they are ready I engage the right people, send furniture to auction and charity shops with the minimum of stress. I go with them Monday August 27 2018
10 TOP TIPS
Trust that you won’t miss what you let go and that clearing space will make you feel fantastic! to their new homes, measure up for furniture, look with them at whether their curtains would work. It becomes easier for them because the end is in sight and the emotional investment in a new home is taking shape.
It’s a step-by-step process that moves quickly some days and like treacle other days. I organise all the physical moves, which helps clients sit back and prepare for their next stage. There has to be an end and there is always relief to have arrived.
I love this work. It’s always said that moving house is top of the stress list and a helping hand can move it down the list. www.themovingplanner.co.uk sue@themovingplanner.co.uk