Simple secrets of a happy marriage

FOR ages I’ve been cogitating about perfect relationships, the happy ever after, Lady and the Tramp sharing a single strand of spaghetti, joined-at-thehip couples and finally I have reached a conclusion. Despite what the “how to” books tell you, these Darbys and Joans haven’t done anything spectacularly clever. They haven’t been especially witty or wise. And they neither need nor deserve a pat on the back.

Life has already sprayed them with magnums of metaphorical champagne. Let’s not confuse their good fortune with skill or talent. Finding “the one” is nothing more than a fortuitous rummage in love’s lucky dip.

If you locate true love and it lasts, then you are unbelievably blessed. You have won the prize, scooped life’s most desirable treasure.

Yes, you can bang on about the mechanics of working at it, the importance of communication, and never going to bed on your anger. Sure, you can extol the virtues of compromise, respect and regular date nights. Frankly, though, if you manage to fancy someone, enjoy their company and take genuine pleasure in their successes for longer than seven short years, you really have lucked out in life’s lottery.

You are the pot that found its lid, the Jack who discovered his Jill and the person who genuinely doesn’t give a monkey’s about all the other fish left swimming about in the sea because you are completely fulfilled by your “other half”.