Tragedy of teacher who believed in everyone but herself
LIGHT AT END OF THE TUNNEL: Life for Nikki Mattocks only changed when she went to college and met a supportive group of friends AN INSPIRATIONAL English teacher was found dead after apparently taking her own life following a battle against low self-esteem, an inquest has heard.
Anna McLeod, 32, encouraged her pupils to “believe in themselves” and yet struggled with her own self-worth and feared she was failing her school.
“She was beautiful and clever, and she would dish out loads of compliments, but never take any for herself,” said her husband
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Robert, a design engineer. “Not only did she have friends, but she had a good family as well.
“She loved her job, but she was always worried about whether she was letting down the school and her pupils and colleagues. She had a big lack of self-worth and that was the basis of her issues.” Mrs McLeod, who was a head of year at Our Lady’s Catholic College in Lancaster,
Ask questions and listen. Open questions are best, ones that allow the person to express how they’re feeling, such as, “How does that affect you?”
Sometimes it’s easier to talk side-by-side or while you are doing something, so consider starting a conversation on a walk.
Resist the urge to offer quick fixes as the recovery from mental health problems can be a long journey.
When a friend or loved one opens up about mental health, keep it simple and do the things you’d normally do.
Some people are not ready to talk about what they’re dealing with. had begun teaching English there in September 2010. She was found hanged at her home last November. The inquest in Lancaster was told on Tuesday that she was prescribed anti-depressants in June 2015.
Her GP, Joanna Smith, said: “In February 2017, she reported she was feeling well. In terms of her history, no previous recordings of self-harm or suicidal thought.” In a narrative verdict, coroner James Newman said her intention was unclear, adding: “Can I rule out a suicide? No. But I have to rely on the evidence and the intent is just not there. She has not talked about self-harm in the past, although she did lack self-esteem and she could not see herself for who she was.’’
At the time of the tragedy, headteacher Helen Seddon said Mrs McLeod was “an excellent teacher” who inspired her students.
I NOW KNOW I’M NOT ALONE, EVEN THOUGH THE ILLNESS TELLS YOU NO ONE CARES
CLIVE BUCKENHAM, 50, a civil servant from Hampshire, had been anxious and depressed for a few months before he confided in his wife Sue. Clive, right, was constantly plagued by feelings of worry over his work performance and relationship with his family. Things got so bad he began to take time off work. “I felt insecure and worried about everything,” he says, “whether my boss was happy with my work, or if I was resented by my colleagues. I’d go home and worry that my wife Sue was angry with me. I had long spells off work and would spend days in bed. There was no point in getting up.” Eventually, after a particularly bad evening at a work Christmas party, he took the first step towards admitting he was struggling. “I left the party early and was chatting to Sue about how badly the night went. She said, ‘Maybe you’re depressed.’ A month later I went to a doctor who diagnosed generalised anxiety disorder.”
Clive decided to share his story on social media and was overwhelmed by the response. “I felt very nervous,” he says. “It’s a big step. There is a stigma around mental health, but I decided to be open about it and that made me feel I’m not alone, even if the illness tells you no one cares.”