Sometimes life can get too bad or too good... in both cases you come to realise that it is empty
I worried about my reputation and my image, how a role model should behave
England’s World Cup-winning fly-half thought he had life ‘nailed down’ after his famous drop-goal sailed through the posts in 2003. On Saturday, he is part of ITV’s exclusive coverage for the rerun of that match against Australia in this year’s quarter-finals. He tells MATTHEW DUNN his magic moment actually marked the moment his life started to unravel.
Q WAS IT EASY TO KEEP YOUR FEET ON THE GROUND AFTER 2003? A At different points, life either gets too bad or too good. In both situations you realise that it is empty. But it took me a long time to realise that. After the World Cup, the only way my feet could lift off the ground is through my own idea of self-importance. Unfortunately, I had that vibe for a while. I was floating well above the ground for a long time in my career because I just figured I was such a successful guy who had it all nailed down. What I found out was that I had very little nailed down. I had it so good with the World Cup, but I realised I had no inherent power because of it. It did not mean I was going to feel brilliant for the rest of my life – it does not work like that. I put myself under so much pressure. I worried about my reputation and image, doing right and doing wrong. How should I be behaving after winning the World Cup? What does a role model do here? With a lot of these things you think deep down that you want that anonymity. Then, you think, you could really let yourself go and enjoy this. But there is no inherent power in being a nobody, either. What I have found since is that life cannot be enjoyed by thinking about it. Life is here now. You can enjoy your memories and imagine your future, but what is important is what is happening now and you have to fully engage with it. Q HOW DID YOU CELEBRATE IMMEDIATELY AFTERWARDS? A There had been a private function, which we popped in to for a bit, but it was pretty heavy-going and I was in a space where I just wanted to find some quiet in the hotel. I walked around until the early hours – the really early hours – and just tried to deeply understand. Q IF ENGLAND WIN THIS WORLD CUP, WOULD YOU ENCOURAGE THE CURRENT SQUAD TO DEAL WITH IT DIFFERENTLY? A If somebody says they are interested in a chat and exploring my view on something, we will go down that route. But there is a danger, when somebody else throws their beliefs into the ring as well, that you would treat that as some sort of new truth. I am only ever working on me. I am not remotely trying to work on anybody else. Q BETWEEN ITV COMMITMENTS, YOU WILL BE HELPING ENGLAND WITH THEIR KICKING. ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT OWEN FARRELL’S MISSES AGAINST ARGENTINA? A The sign of a really accomplished kicker is not whether they go over all the time, it is the ability consciously to make sure the next is an improvement. He shaved the post and hit the post and was never far off. I know what it is like to miss three kicks and think, ‘I really want to get this next one’. Then the boys score in the corner. Thanks for that! But Owen started kicking brilliantly in the second half and, on the plus side, it is way better to get challenged and put into that space where you have to dig in and focus. Q COULD ANOTHER DROP-GOAL WIN THE WORLD CUP? A As a player you need to work on it just enough to ensure it is on the top level of your tool box. If it has sunk to the bottom, it can take too long to think of and the opportunity is gone. Q WILL A WEEKEND OFF DURING THE TYPHOON HELP ENGLAND? A We needed to find out exactly where we stand and what we still
need to do. After Argentina were reduced to 14 men, England needed an honest, transparent and very effective test to build from. We got it from Wales in the 2003 quarter-finals, thank you very much, because it set us up to beat France in the semis. In 2007, we got it from South Africa in the pool stage. Without a hammering from them, we would not have reached the final. England are entering the knockout stages without needing to really get up to speed.
As a player you need to work on the drop-goal just enough so that it’s on the top level of your tool box