In suburbia
arrives. Inside is a baby boy and a message: “Raise the child and be released”.
At least the kid grows up quickly.After three months, he looks about nine and has developed the dead-eyed gaze of a ventriloquist dummy.
All kids like a good stare but this one rarely blinks.And when he’s not mimicking the mannerisms and voices of Gemma and Tom (Eisenberg and Poots are sampled by the sound designer), he’s speaking with the horribly distorted voice of Irish child actor Senan Jennings.
He also makes two noises.When happy, he barks like dog.When he wants something, he emits a horrible high-pitched scream. Gemma and Tom have to put up with this until the box’s creepy promise is honoured.
Before we get there, Finnegan (who worked on similar stories for Charlie Brooker’s Black Mirror) makes the tension simmer as Tom hatches an escape plan and a rift emerges between the couple.
The plot could have done with a couple more twists but it’s a clever, stylish and well-acted film.
After seeing what Poots and Eisenberg go through, coronavirus doesn’t seem quite so scary.
BLOODSHOT
★★★
(Cert 12A, 109mins. Available for digital purchase today via all major platforms)
VIN Diesel’s hero doesn’t come from Marvel or DC but from Valiant Comics, the less iconic outfit that began publishing in the late 80s.
And it may feel like his amnesiac supersoldier has been beamed into your home from the era of RoboCop and Terminator.
After an enjoyably cheesy half-hour, you may be tempted to call it a rip-off. Resist! It turns out there is more to this bionic killing machine than first meets the eye.
Our hero is Ray Garrison, a US Special Forces soldier killed by over-the-top villain played by Toby Kebbell. But he awakens in a secret lab with Guy Pearce’s scientist Dr Emil Harting. Ray has been rebuilt as a super-soldier with hulking strength who can be instantly healed by microscopic robots in his veins.
What he doesn’t have is any firm memories of his life as Ray. Brief flashbacks hint at the old story about the murdered wife and the revenge mission but this time not all the cliches are unintentional.And director DaveWilson serves up some solid action scenes as Diesel bashes goons and smashes cars. @NJStreitberger
A Midsummer Night’s Dream and the devilishly funny and frightening Dr Faustus. There are also signlanguage productions and all plays can be rented for 48 hours.
(bachtrack.com/video)
IF your preferences lie more with opera, ballet or classical music, you could do no better than searching this amazing resource that puts you in touch with online productions available around the world.
Whether it is the Finnish National Ballet’s Pippi Longstocking or The Marriage Of Figaro at Staatsoper Berlin, this is the portal for you.
DOGS DON’T WEAR PANTS
(Cert 18, 105mins. Streaming now on Curzon Home Cinema)
IF YOU devoured the Fifty Shades Of Grey books, you might be ready to move on to the hard stuff.
This Finnish drama about a grieving widower (Pekka Strang) who forges an unusual relationship with a dominatrix (Krista Kosonen) isn’t for the faint-hearted but it’s surprisingly touching.