Pony’s living on a mare

IT’S always good to see fresh faces on television.And there are several on Channel 5’s new series THISWEEK ON THE FARM (8pm), hosted by Helen Skelton and Jules Hudson. Most notably, Jon Bon Pony.

Yes, that’s his real name. Or at least the name he’s been given by his owner, Rob Nicholson, at Barnsley’s Cannon Hall Farm.

Jon Bon, as he’s known for short, is a pony of the Shetland variety.

And he’s been saddled with that somewhat embarrassing moniker, Rob explains, “because he’s got a really funky hairstyle and he’s a bit of an equine rock star. He managed to get all these five mares pregnant on the same weekend. He’s a monumental…erm, worker.”

Rob, mind you, has become a tad concerned of late, fearing Jon Bon has lost his vim and vigour.

“He’s become a bit of a pipeand-slippers man,” he observes.

And while you and I might not be entirely surprised to hear this

– the poor thing must be absolutely worn out – Rob wants farm vet David to take a closer look.

So David does.And it turns out Jon Bon Pony needs a trip to the dentist. Poor Jon Bon.

Elsewhere, there’s an even fresher face, a baby lamb just hours old, who needs medical attention of a particularly urgent kind.

Her mummy has accidentally trodden on her leg and broken it. Vet Matt must act fast.

He realigns the bones and applies a fast-setting fibre-glass cast. He seems happy with the result.There’s just one big decision still to be taken.

In which cute pattern of bandage should the leg be wrapped? “A tractor bandage or a little piggies bandage?” Matt asks vet David.

“I’d go tractor myself,” says David. “But it’s a little girl, so what do you think…?”

“Little pink piggies?” suggests Matt. Little pink piggies it is.

(Cue: a storm of outrage on Twitter, calling them out for subjecting this lamb to gender-stereotyping.)

Also in this opening episode, a handsome bull called Ted is being prepared for the county show.

But it won’t be the usual county show because obviously none of that stuff is allowed to happen this year. Instead it’ll have to be an online version. “An online show is better than no show,” insists Rob.

He clearly didn’t watch the latest series of Have I Got News For You.

Also tonight, in the final part of CHASING THE MOON (Channel

4, 10pm), Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin have taken mankind’s very first steps on the lunar surface.

But will they safely blast off again?

There’s only one chance to get it right – so they can hook back up with the command module and return home..?

Well yes, obviously.