Right on blooming Kew

TRUTH be told, I’m not much of a gardener. And if you’d like to enhance the accuracy of that statement, feel free to delete the “much of”. When we curl up on the sofa of a Friday night, Mrs Tonight’s TV and I, to join dear Monty Don and his dogs in their Gardeners’ World, we do so for two reasons only.

First, to relax at the end of a busy working week, to allow ourselves to be transported to an altogether calmer place.

And second, so we can crack the little joke we like to crack every week at that time. “Gosh, look at us,” we chuckle, “watching Gardeners’ World together, like Darby and Joan!”

What I don’t watch Gardeners’ World for is advice on gardening. When it gets to that bit where Monty sets us actual homework – “Here are some jobs for the weekend…” – I’m the viewer who jabs a finger in each ear and shouts, “La-la-la, can’t hear you.” That’s because gardening, done properly, is seriously hard work, and hard work is something we armchair gardeners feel is best left to the truly dedicated.

One of the things I like about Channel 5’s new series KEW GARDENS:AYEAR IN BLOOM (8pm) is it’s full of such types, and such is the extent of both their dedication and their expertise that there’s not even the merest suggestion we should be trying this stuff at home. Nobody’s going to pop up near the end of the show and nag us to trim our banana trees.

The Royal Botanic Gardens, the setting for this four-part, seasonby-season documentary, are vast on a scale that makes Monty Don’s place look like a window box – 320 acres of them, usually attracting two million visitors a year.

And it’s not just about keeping it looking pretty. Behind the scenes there’s groundbreaking research and conservation work. It’s an absolute joy to sit and watch them get on with it.

Afterwards, still on Channel 5, this week’s episode of ESCAPE TOTHE FARM WITH KATE HUMBLE (9pm) finds our hostess looking somewhat glum. They’re planting a load of new trees, which is tremendous, but they’re also having to cut down one of the huge majestic ashes, which is badly diseased.

“There’s nothing happy about seeing a beautiful tree come down,” she sighs,

I must say I’m entirely with her on this.When a familiar tree in my local park has to undergo urgent surgery or worse, I actually get a little tearful.

But then I think perhaps lately we’ve all grown a little more appreciative of nature.

I also think perhaps I’m a bit odd.

And if you’d like to enhance the accuracy of that statement, feel free to delete “a bit”.