SOAP WATCH

The secrets people keep, and the lies they tell to keep their skeletons hidden, are the backbone of soap; but telling the truth has its disadvantages. The problem with coming clean is that it shines a torch on the lies that led up to the moment of confession.

The second episode of yesterday’s Coronation Street (by Ella Greenhill) was an exquisite piece of drama dealing with two characters’ lies: Beth, who’s been keeping quiet over the fact that Craig’s father is in prison; and Leanne, who decided it was best to be honest about Steve McDonald being the father of her unborn baby. Going down like a lead balloon doesn’t begin to cover the lack of enthusiasm with which both confessions were received; lead mine couldn’t even begin to cover it.

In East Enders, secrets remained the order of the day when Kush was upset with Denise for refusing to admit the troof about being pregnant; this week, when Denise remains quiet about the father’s identity, Carmel tells her that the troof will always come out – as Emmerdale’s Bernice warns Kerry after her fling, too.

Well, it will with the rent- a-gobs who inhabit soapland.

MOST DOOMED RELATIONSHIP ‘’E’s just the right side of possessive.’ Eva, about Aidan, Corrie

COLD COMFORT OF THE WEEK ‘I’m sure your mum ’ad a good reason for lyin’ yer ’ole life.’ Kirk, to Craig, about Beth, Corrie