Heroes & hoaxers

A gripping new series following the London Ambulance Service will have you on the edge of your seat

Everyone who works in an emergency services control room has one – a story of what they all call, perhaps too politely, ‘inappropriate use of our services’. For Pete Crean, a control room manager for the London Ambulance Service, the call that still stands out came on a busy Friday night amid the usual stabbings and car crashes.

‘This man said he was at a pub quiz and didn’t know one of the answers – who was the president of the Republic of Ireland? I was so flabbergasted I gave him the answer,’ admits Pete. ‘I suppose that night I was his phone-a-friend.’

He is matter-of-fact about this abuse of his position, but I’ll bet that when you watch Pete and his colleagues grapple with such issues during their shifts in a new documentary series following the work of the London Ambulance Service, you won’t be so understanding.

One of the most shocking scenes comes in the second episode. In it we learn that a 92-year-old man named Eric has been lying on the ground for three hours after a fall because it’s a busy night at ambulance control. When his ambulance is finally just round the corner, however, it’s diverted to the other side of London. The reason? A woman is suffering a miscarriage and the risk of loss of life sends her to the top of the queue.

But after a nail-biting journey it emerges that the woman is not miscarrying. She’s not even pregnant. She’s a hoaxer – and a very skilled one, according to paramedic Shani Smith. ‘I was quite shocked at how convincing she was,’ Shani says. This is not the first time today an ambulance has rushed to the woman, and, sickeningly, it won’t be the last. Staff become concerned that she has mental health issues, but should she be punished for abusing the system?

It’s a complex issue. Cuts in services for the mentally ill mean it’s often the ambulance service that picks up the pieces. ‘We’re there 24/ 7, 365 days a year, which means we’re always contactable,’ says Pete Crean. ‘Sometimes they have no one left to call.’

He says his toughest day in the job came on 7/7, with the London bombings. ‘The control room was eerily quiet as the enormity of what was unfolding became clear,’ he recalls. ‘Afterwards, I went home, gave my wife the biggest hug and went to the pub. When I walked in – still in uniform – the place erupted with applause, and someone bought me a drink.’

There are some lighter moments – in one episode, paramedics are making a cup of tea for a 94-year-old, Peggy, who’s fallen over. They seem to provide the only human contact she’s had for days. Just as you want to weep, though, as they carry her on a stretcher down the steps of her block of flats, she informs them that it’s so bumpy she might have an orgasm, and she’s never had one of those before, despite having had ‘two husbands and a lover’.

All those we spoke to had one wish, above all, about the effect of this series. ‘We hope that people who watch it think a little, when they think they might need us,’ says Pete. ‘Do they really?’ Ambulance starts on Tuesday at 9pm on BBC1.

London Paramedic Shani Smith