CORONATION STREET

Soap sisters are so unalike, it’s often hard to believe they came out of the same womb – as Coronation Street’s Tim pointed out when Rosie returned last week. Model and ‘hostess’, she couldn’t be more different from lesbian Christian Sophie and, as Tim again astutely remarked, ‘Sally must’ve been knocking back the Red Bull for nine months.’

Rosie’s return is as welcome as the departure of EastEnders’ Ronnie and Roxy, who recently met their end in a swimming pool. They rarely had a good word to say about each other, not least because they were prone to sharing their menfolk.

In Emmerdale, half-sisters Bernice and Nicola provide most of the female sibling entertainment and have one thing in common – they’re both sex mad. How this tallied with Bernice marrying gay Lawrence is anyone’s guess, but we’ll have to wait and see whether she’ll be drawn back to Andy’s six-pack if and when he returns (we can but hope).

Meanwhile, back in Corrie, Leanne, Toyah and Eva (all half/step/semi sisters – I’ve lost track) have fallen out. In soapland, don’t expect a rendition of the song Sisters any time soon.

WITNESS FOR THE PRETENCE?

‘I want to know everything there is to know about vegetables,’ said Rosie last week, trying to distract Brian while Sophie buried drugs in his allotment after finding them planted in Rosie’s suitcase. When Rosie confides in Adam, he forms a plan and tries to enlist Todd. I loathe drugs plotlines as they’re all the same, so I hope Corrie moves on from this one soon.

Bethany’s drawn further into Nathan’s lair when he tells her how much he fancies her and they kiss passionately. I suspect this online video stuff will lead to her being asked to get her kit off; but when Nathan’s arrested

on suspicion of abducting Annabel Adams (pictured), will Bethany give him an alibi?

Have you noticed how much time Nathan spends in his car, by the way? I didn’t think he could walk at first. He must have whiplash from leaning over to window-chat with Bethany whenever she passes by (i.e. all the time).

Ken’s not happy with Daniel’s new relationship and worries Sinead will drag his son down. Why not? She drags every vowel down below sea level. Whenever she says something’s not ‘furrr’, I think she’s obsessed with mink. It’s F.A.I.R. OK? ‘This isn’t poetry, Daniel,’ she said last week. You’re telling me.