EASTENDERS

PASS THE BABY

The fight for baby Abi is fast turning into Pass The Parcel as warring factions compete for custody. With Max’s bristly beard in permanent danger of scalping the poor child, I’m not sure he should be the rightful owner. Let’s hope he passes the parcel quickly and controls his fury when he hears that Cora’s solicitor knows his marriage to Rainie is a fake. It’s a volatile situation, and despite Rainie saying they all need to do what’s best for Abi (finally!), Cora lashes out, leaving Rainie injured. Max (pictured, with Abi) is stunned when, in the chaos, the police arrive to take Abi away. Will anyone ever get to unwrap that last piece of paper and win the baby parcel?

There’s a lot of baby stuff at the moment, with Bev hatching a plan and trying to convince Hayley of what is best for her daughter. There’s not a parent in Walford who ever seems to know what’s right for their children, which is why they all grow up to be such a mess.

Poor Martin is struggling in the overcrowded household and it’s clear he can’t get to the bathroom in the mornings to put a comb through his hair. The problem is slightly alleviated when Ruby decides to leave and Stacey manages to land her one of Jack’s flats. Tired of Max at the house, Martin tells Stacey he has to go. Oh, if only you hadn’t fallen out with property mogul Jack, Max.

It comes to something when the most cheerful part of the week is Dot and Dr Legg discussing funeral plans. Florists on standby...