JONATHAN CAINER

Dear Jonathan, You say you don’t recommend reading more than one prediction, but I’m an Aquarian born on the day my sign begins. So, I often find myself reading the forecast for Capricorn, too. Tristan Dear Tristan, A feature on my website (and on many ot

ARIES Mar 21 — Apr 20

THEY say the definition of insanity involves doing the same thing over and over, expecting a different result each time. But what if one day you win the Lottery? No matter how lifechanging the sum, you can’t expect to win it again. You can keep buying tickets from the same place, at the same time of day, but you just won’t repeat your success. So there, at least, the definition of insanity is exactly the opposite. This week, the definition of sanity is clear. Know what it is that you are actually doing. Uncertain? I’ve recorded a very special message for you. Give me four minutes and I’ll give you the key to your future. Call 0906 751 5601.

TAURUS Apr 21 — May 21

THOSE who are genuinely riskaverse cannot help but acknowledge that, in being so, there is a real element of risk! Fortune favours the brave. Who dares wins. It takes but a moment to seize a passing opportunity, yet we can spend a whole lifetime regretting the fact we let one of these pass us by. Arguably, under some circumstances, it is wiser to take a gamble than to play it safe. You do, indeed, need to be cautious this week. But that includes being cautious about

the extent of your own caution. Confused? I’ve recorded a very special message for you. Give me four minutes and I’ll give you the key to your future. Call 0906 751 5602.

GEMINI May 22 — June 22

IS THIS due to be a good week or a bad week? Why don’t you tell me? Yes, I know I am the astrologer and it ought to be up to me to tell you. But you are the client. You are the one with the power to choose the way in which you respond to various challenges. One thing we can clearly agree on (as evidenced by our conversation so far) is that this is a week during which arguments over wrongs and responsibilities can arise too easily. Your role (and responsibility) is to be positive. Worried? I’ve recorded a very special message for you. Give me four minutes and I’ll give you the key to your future. Call 0906 751 5603.

CANCER June 23 — July 23

WHEREVER we go, we follow ourselves. Even if we go where there’s no one else, we still have our own company. You might think this is obvious. Why is my astrologer reminding me I can’t ever get away from myself? But if people feel there is an aspect of themselves they are not particularly pleased about, you would be amazed by what lengths they go to in a futile

attempt to alter their own identity. Yet this week, all you have to do is love yourself. That may yet prove easier than you expect. Uncertain? I’ve recorded a very special message for you. Give me four minutes and I’ll give you the key to your future. Call 0906 751 5604.

LEO July 24 — Aug 23

‘ACTING on your best behaviour, turn your back on Mother Nature, everybody want to rule the world.’ It is nearly 30 years since Tears For Fears had a hit with that song. Several more individuals have attempted global domination in the interim. I would love to tell you that this week you get your chance — but it might be fairer to say it puts you in closer contact with your own desire to rise to such a position of power. It may be necessary to settle for the smaller portion of world that you actually can rule! anxious? I’ve recorded a very special message for you. Give me four minutes and I’ll give you the key to your future. Call 0906 751 5605.

VIRGO Aug 24 — Sep 23

I HAVE memories of being so bored at school that I started staring at a ruler. All those tiny divisions, each marking a millimetre. Who in the world would ever care about making a distinction so small? Inches may count, centimetres may matter, but such minuscule separations are surely of no consequence. Or if they are, they probably need to be measured with something more accurate than a piece of plastic. This week in your life, at least, if you get the big principles right, all else will fall into place. Confused? I’ve recorded a very special message for you. Give me four minutes and I’ll give you the key to your future. Call 0906 751 5606. LIBRA Sep 24 — Oct 23

‘THE Grand old Duke of York, he had 10,000 men, he marched them up to the top of the hill and he marched them down again.’ Many have pondered the true meaning of this old rhyme. It is mysterious. York is quite flat. It has no hills and the population has always been small. From where could he have got 10,000 men? But in going up to the top and then reversing the decision, that Duke set a grand example for us all — and one you would do well to remember this week. Sometimes, it’s OK to change your mind. Worried? I’ve recorded a very special message for you. Give me four minutes and I’ll give you the key to your future. Call 0906 751 5607.

SCORPIO Oct 24 — Nov 22

THERE may be many reasons why two people are not on speaking terms. Perhaps they were once close, but fell out. Or they may have never been formally introduced and are unable even to find each other’s Facebook page. While we are being whimsical, we may care to question the phrase ‘speaking terms’. What if two people do speak civilly and cordially, yet never say anything of any importance? This week’s question is not ‘who are you speaking to?’, but ‘who are you truly communicating with?’ Uncertain? I’ve recorded a very special message for you. Give me four minutes and I’ll give you the key to your future. Call 0906 751 5608.

SAGITTARIUS Nov 23 — Dec 21

IS THAT an elephant? Surely not. How silly of me to suggest it. Let us have no more such suggestions and focus instead on today’s tusk. Let us consider the issues that have been packed away in a case so large it may as working,well be is calledit? In oura trunk. attempt And ... to Oh, ignoreit isn’t the biggest issue of all, we are drawing even more attention to it. Can it really be wrong, this week, to tackle a topic of conversation even if it is one that others are most reluctant to discuss? anxious? I’ve recorded a very special message for you. Give me four minutes and I’ll give you the key to your future. Call 0906 751 5609.

CAPRICORN

Dec 22 — Jan 20 WHERE would police be without criminals? What would doctors do without patients? If cars were totally reliable, how would motoring organisations ever gain customers? Isn’t it always in the interest of a problem-solver to have a problem to solve? If you truly seek the solution to a set of circumstances this week, it may not be so wise to rely entirely on the advice of someone who benefits from the existence of a tricky situation. Unwittingly, they may be exacerbating the issue. Confused? I’ve recorded a very special message for you. Give me four minutes and I’ll give you the key to your future. Call 0906 751 5610.

AQUARIUS

Jan 21 — Feb 19 ‘DON’T bang your head against a brick wall.’ People love to give each other advice like this. They figure that they can protect their friends from the kind of stress that ensues when unrealistic expectations are raised — especially when these lead to a debilitating expenditure of time and effort. Yet who would ever engage in such a process? When we attempt the impossible, it is usually because we suspect it is not as impossible as it appears. That could be the case for you this week. Worried? I’ve recorded a very special message for you. Give me four minutes and I’ll give you the key to your future. Call 0906 751 5611. PISCES

Feb 20 — Mar 20 IF YOU open your eyes, how will you see your dreams? The moment you open them, all you will see are people who are keen to show you what they have been dreaming of. Perhaps that eye contact will, in turn, enhance your own ability to communicate your dreams. But even so, you will be able to share the dreams only you have previously had. You will be awake, after all, and folk who are awake don’t dream! As dreams constantly evolve, it will benefit you to stay in closer contact with yours this week. anxious? I’ve recorded a very special message for you. Give me four minutes and I’ll give you the key to your future. Call 0906 751 5612.