From TOWIE to BGT, it’s acronym UK

TWO recent controversies — the use of a doggy stuntdouble on Britain’s Got Talent and Olympian Bruce Jenner’s transformation into Caitlyn — meant that there was a good deal of talk about BGT and LGBT. But which is which? These acronyms stand for Britain’s Got Talent and Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender, but it is all too easy to muddle them up. In a world increasingly full of acronyms, I offer this handy cut-out-and-keep mnemonic to keep all you slow-coaches up to speed.

BGT gives a platform to clones of clones GBH can mean more than a few broken bones

HB grades pencils to various degrees HBO brings British telly to its knees

OMG is a yelp of surprise or delight GMT keeps ticking all day and all night

LGBT: there must be something in the water LBJ was blamed for sending lambs to the slaughter

LBW is cricket’s most contentious issue SWALK is what girls write when they miss you

GL was LGBT, before it expanded GLC governed London, before being disbanded

GTA is a game involving murder galore GDP is — TBH — a bit of a bore

GP takes temperatures, from morning till late PG may be unsuitable for a child under eight

GNP is the sum of products sold in a year BNP is fuelled by suspicion and fear

FBI was run by Hoover, who may have had rabies IVF is a treatment for those who want babies

BTW signals something too dull to mention TOWIE is a show that, frankly, lacks tension

TB is a disease and a former Prime Minister TLC is touchy-feely, but nothing more sinister

TBC — To Be Cancelled, more likely than not TCP is ideal for a sore or a spot

PVC is a mix of plastic — versatile and fast PFI heralded Blair’s break with the past

BFI: British movies, they’ve got ’em BTM is how posh children say ‘bottom’

MYOB should never be said to your aunt BSM: ‘For God’s sake, brake!’ ‘But I can’t!’

MTB is unwelcome at a regatta BLT may be tasty, but it makes you fatter

DLT is also remembered for quack-quack-oops ELP became one of the first ‘supergroups’

CPS decides if you’re going to trial HSBC is the creepiest bank by a mile

CSN&Y were a group often seen with a reefer FIFA is a body correctly pronounced ‘Thiefer’

TGIF suggests the weekend’s in sight TGWU was the union which then became UNITE

VIP may be P but is neither V nor I and TTFN was the way JY said ‘Goodbye’