Ephraim Hardcastle
THE Duchess of Cambridge has accepted her first military patronage, taking over the Air Cadets from Prince Philip. Kate has so far avoided military appointments. There was a fear among courtiers that she would rather like to avoid them altogether. But in taking on a role that supports young people in William’s beloved RAF – and one that doesn’t require her to wear a uniform – she has made a careful first step. The next big question is: will she consent to Prince George undertaking the traditional military training expected of an heir to the throne? APROPOS Prince Philip, it’s said he’d like Kate to take over from him as Colonel of the Grenadier Guards. Now in his 45th year with the Grenadiers, handing this duty to Kate would mean a lot to him. Founded in 1656, the Grenadiers have had only one female Colonel – Princess Elizabeth, appointed at the age of 16 in 1942. Another glamorous Colonel (who would not be required to wear uniform) would go down well in the officers’ mess. NOTING the much-hyped release of the new Star Wars film this week, Leader of the House Chris Grayling says of his Labour opposite number, Chris ‘Captain Underpants’ Bryant, pictured: ‘A number of people have described him as the Jar Jar Binks of the Labour Party.’ As Star Wars devotees know, the com- puter-generated Jar Jar Binks, also pictured, is regarded as the franchise’s ‘most hated character’ by fans. The annoying alien was axed from the latest film. Surely an ungenerous assessment by Grayling of former Anglican priest Bryant, particularly during the coming goodwill-to-all men season. PRESIDENTIAL hopeful Hillary Clinton pays tribute to the talents of curvaceous pop star Beyoncé, gushing : ‘You see her in person, you’re just stunned... so I want to be as good a president as Beyoncé is a performer.’ This is very generous considering Beyoncé’s vulgar reference to husband Bill Clinton’s infamous antics with White House intern Monica Lewinsky in her sexually explicit 2013 song Partition: ‘He popped all my buttons and he ripped my blouse/ He Monica Lewinski’d all on my gown.’ Last year, ex-White House intern Ms Lewinsky responded, saying: ‘Thanks, Beyoncé, but if we’re verbing, I think you meant “Bill Clinton’d all on my gown”, not “Monica Lewinsky’d”.’ THE Queen, who earned her thrift badge in the Kingfisher Patrol of the 1st Buckingham Palace Guides, likes to offset the expenses of a family Christmas. Her biggest festive revenue is the sale of trees from the 20,000-acre Sandringham estate. Retailing at around £10 a foot, they are ‘a nice little earner’, as they’d say in TV’s Only Fools and Horses. HM was once given a toy model of Derek Trotter’s yellow threewheeler in her stocking. My source says: ‘When the gifts were laid out on the table on Christmas Eve, there was the Robin Reliant. Whether she got the joke I don’t know.’