MWAH, MWAH! HOW TO KISS WITHOUT IT BECOMING THE HOKEY COKEY
IN MY father’s day, kissing and hugging was what you hoped might happen in the back row of the cinema if you were lucky.
Now, it is part and parcel of everyday social interaction.
What are the rules when it comes to social kissing? One kiss or two? And which cheek first?
There are few things worse than that mortifying moment when you go in for the second peck and the recipient has already backed away. Realising what’s occurring, they head back in — but by then, you’ve moved out and it’s in/out, in/out like some hideous head-butters’ hokey cokey, which leaves everyone feeling awkward before you have even finished saying ‘hello’.
Here are the rules. Women, when
they meet, do not kiss on first meeting. You can kiss as you say goodbye for the first time.
Among women, with acquaintances and friends, two kisses is the way to go, and you kiss the right cheek first (in France, they kiss the left cheek first, so it pays to know which country you are in).
Two kisses is a greeting. Curiously, one kiss is considered more intimate. A man should offer a woman two kisses unless she is established as his partner, in which case he should give one. With social kissing, the key is confidence. Head in firmly, go for the two kisses and have done with it. Any element of doubt and the horrendous hovering begins.
In a work setting, a handshake is a safer bet than kissing — unless you work in fashion. And never air-kiss — unless you work in fashion.
In the UK, men do not kiss one another as a form of greeting. They shake hands and, at the same time, pat each other on the back. This is changing, but tread carefully. Sons can kiss fathers, and brothers can kiss brothers. If you are a bloke, don’t kiss your boss —however well you know him.
Among younger men, the hug is finding increasing favour. It’s more friendly than a handshake and less awkward than a kiss. Again, confidence is key. Arms out, quick squeeze, arms back at your side again.
And whatever you do, unless you are a son, grandson or great-grandson, do not kiss or hug the Duke of Edinburgh. He is 95. It’s not his thing.