Sorry, but I’m not a doctor

SOME weeks I get a batch of readers’ letters and my heart sinks. It was the case after grandmother Hilary (July 16) wrote in, worried because her grandson was shy and withdrawn.

A few people suggested my reply was wrong as I should have realised that the boy is on the autistic spectrum. L was forthright: ‘Usually I agree with everything you say, but I’m aghast at the reply you have given this lady — more or less telling her to butt out and mind her own business!!

‘Peter clearly has Asperger’s syndrome and for him to get the full help he needs, his parents must push for the diagnosis!’

Can I just say that may well be the case, but it is not appropriate for an advice columnist to make a diagnosis off the page.

My actual advice to the grandmother was not to cut off all contact with her family, and not to cause rows, but to be patient and calm and ‘do nothing except love, watch and wait’.

In other words, be vigilant and not rush into conclusions or arguments. Sensible — whatever the truth.

If you remember, I offered the analogy of three doors to choose between, an idea many other readers loved.

Y wrote: ‘I feel so relieved and uplifted . . . seeing how much more joy and pleasure I am going to have with my family by always choosing the third door.’

Now, an apology. Last week I recommended a book called The Handbook For Exceptional People. But disappointed readers have informed me it’s only available online at ‘silly prices’.

Ruefully, I contacted the author, brilliant life coach Jez Cartwright, to ask if it will be reprinted. He tells me he is writing a new edition!

Meanwhile, two of his own recommended reads are M. Scott Peck’s classic The Road Less Travelled, and The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, by Stephen Covey.

One of mine is The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success by Deepak Chopra — and all are available cheaply online.