My 3-year-old granddaughter wears nail polish

Novelist, grandmother of four and ex-Blue Peter presenter, Janet ellis, 61, answers your questions . . .

QMY DAUGHTER-in-law lets my three-year-old granddaughter wear nail varnish and I just don’t feel it is appropriate.

I noticed this for the first time about a month ago, when they all came round for Sunday lunch. She rushed up to show off her sparkly pink nails. I thought it was a one-off.

Since then, however, she seems to be wearing a new colour every time I see her. I think she must be getting them from her mum.

While I don’t want to come across as interfering, I can’t help worrying that this is encouraging her to grow up too fast. First it’s nail polish, next it will be make-up and inappropriate clothes.

I believe childhood is so important. What can I do?

ALet’s go straight to the positives: your son’s family came for sunday lunch, which is lovely — and your granddaughter wanted to share her pleasure in her sparkly fingers with you, which is gorgeous. I suspect that your negative reaction is out of character.

Watching little ones grow up is an endless, enjoyable tussle between encouraging their precocity (surely her speech or singing or dancing is advanced for her age?) and enjoying a childhood full of cuddles and stories.

there’s no doubt it all seems to happen very fast. something about the passage of time unsettles you. I don’t know if you have daughters, but, even if you don’t, you’ll be aware that teenage girls struggle with body issues. It’s joyful that a three-year-old has no such problems.

Little girls often enjoy copying mum and she’ll have regarded having a manicure as a game. she won’t be worried about the colour or concerned it’s going to chip. All of which suggests it might be your daughter- in- law’s attitude you have the problem with. the next generation can seem much more sophisticated than we were but, despite modern technology and the fastmoving pace of modern life, your son and his wife are still fairly new parents, trying to do their best. You obviously think that what starts with nail polish will finish with all sorts of unsuitable experiences. But her parents will be just as keen to protect their daughter. Your granddaughter is lucky to have a grandmother who cares about how she’ll learn and thrive. All too soon, she’ll be concerned with boys and make-up, and if you’ve been a ready listener and a fount of wisdom, she’ll come to you for advice. You’ll make her childhood special by being part of it, not by standing on the sidelines wringing your hands. It’s time to join her party. Go and buy several bottles of nail varnish. the next time your granddaughter visits, paint your nails all the colours of the rainbow and then let her admire them. she’s not too young for sparkly nail fun — and you’re not too old!