Ephraim Hardcastle
WHOEVER wins the election, what’s to be done about the mooted visit of Donald Trump? Our exnational security adviser Lord Ricketts, 64, calls for it to be postponed. With London mayor Sadiq Khan likely to snub an invitation to the state banquet, 1.8million signing a petition against the visit and Speaker John Bercow refusing to allow President Trump into Westminster Hall, predicted election winner Theresa May is in a bind. Once she has fixed a date with the White House, the Queen issues an invitation in her own hand. Only HM can subsequently rescind it. ‘No one can recall HMQ having to do so,’ says my source. ‘What usually happens is that the prospective visitor declines the invitation, citing illness, family or political issues. But would tricky Mr Trump comply?’ AS David Dimbleby presents his tenth general election night show, a BBC source points out: ‘His father, Richard Dimbleby, used his sharp elbows to get this top job in 1955 by ousting the favourite, Teddy Thompson, the BBC’s first parliamentary correspondent.’ Curious, isn’t it, that Jeremy Paxman is being tipped for a knighthood when the more established David Dimbleby doesn’t have one – unless Dimbleby has turned one down on the basis that his father didn’t get one? CHASTISING Damian Lyons Lowe, whose firm Survation has predicted a hung parliament, Paisley-born BBC presenter Andrew Neil warns him: ‘As they say in Glasgow, “Your jaiket’s on a shoogly peg”’ – ie, your position is not secure. Pollsters are currently on a par popularity-wise with ambulance-chasing accident lawyers. COMIC Jimmy Tarbuck paid amusing tribute to Ronnie Corbett at his Westminster Abbey service of thanksgiving, recalling that the 5ft entertainer became an RAF officer during National Service, before adding deadpan: ‘His uniform came from Mothercare.’ Actress Dame Penelope Keith, representing the Prince of Wales and Duchess of Cornwall, swept into the Abbey regally, glad-handing church officials, as did Sarah Ferguson, pictured, appearing on behalf of her exhusband the Duke of York. Tres raffine! ITV signs ex-chancellor George Osborne and his former Labour shadow Ed Balls as its ‘star pundit duo’ for tonight. It doesn’t expect to inflate ratings much, I am told, but hopes it might deflate the self-esteem of its regular presenters, semi-royal newscaster Tom Bradby and selfabsorbed political editor Robert Peston. RE ITV News, isn’t its relationship with Google too cosy? The search giant, which owns YouTube – a platform used by Islamic State for propaganda – is providing analysis on social media coverage of the election results during the night. Says ITV defensively: ‘They’re not sponsors, neither are they being paid. They’ll be based outside of the studio in the atrium.’ HUMORIST Frank Muir called bossy TV arts presenter Joan Bakewell ‘the thinking man’s crumpet’. Was the old boy (without knowing it) a sapiosexual, defined by dating app OkCupid as one ‘for whom sexual attraction is based on intellect and not necessarily on looks’?