BLIND DATE
WHO’LL FIND LOVE ON OUR
EACH week, we send a couple out for dinner. Then we report back on their blind date, and add a little bit of advice designed to help the rest of us.
This week Susan Punchard and Ray Richardson dined at The Woolpack in Aylesbury, Bucks.
Divorced with one daughter, 55-year- old Susan is a freelance hair stylist who lives in Berkhamsted, Hertfordshire. Ray is 62, and lives in Princes Risborough, Bucks. He works mainly as a support artist for TV, and also as a painter and decorator.
Susan, 55, says:
I WAS looking forward to the date. I don’t really get nervous — I was excited.
When I arrived, I was led to an empty table. I noticed a lone man on the next table who looked nice, though I instantly saw he was not my type. Then the waitress came over and said there’d been a mix up — that was my date!
We chatted about our work and children. Even though I soon knew he wasn’t for me, I wanted to make an effort — and did ask most of the questions.
It became clear we didn’t have a lot in common. I love holidays and go twice a year, and he hasn’t had one since 2008. And he’s not very sporty, which is a big thing for me.
We didn’t laugh much either, which I think is important as it creates chemistry. I didn’t feel there was a spark, but Ray is easy to talk to, and I had a lovely evening.
Maybe I’m a bit fussy, but having been single for four years now and divorced since I was 31, I know what I want. I’ve had a couple of long-term partners since my marriage ended (I have a grown-up daughter from that relationship).
I wish I had someone to go on holidays and spend weekends with. But I have a very full and active life. I’m able to fit my work around the things I like doing, such as going to the gym and playing tennis. I’m my own boss, at work and at home.
It’s also harder to meet men nowadays. Younger men want younger women, and I find older men less attractive. I tried internet dating, but it was disappointing.
As for the restaurant, it was quite busy and they had sold out of the sea bass and chocolate bombe — so not my night for food either! But I enjoyed the date even though no sparks flew.
After a few hours, I wanted to get home as I had an early start. As we walked to our cars I think Ray mentioned being matched up again, but I kept my reply vague as I knew there was no point.
Ray is a lovely man, and would make someone a wonderful partner, but I know he’s not for me. I’m not sure he was that disappointed.
I’m very independent and don’t think I’m looking for someone to live with again, but I would love a bit of romance. The evening reinforced my belief that rather than go searching, I will wait for some- one to come along, and get on with my life in the meantime. LIKES: He was easy to talk to. REGRETS: He wasn’t sporty. CAB/COFFEE: Cab. VERDICT: 6/10
Ray, 62, says:
I LIKE a woman who cares about the way she looks, so I was delighted when I first saw Susan. She’s exactly the kind of woman I’m attracted to. I had seen her at the bar and wondered if she could be my date, but then she sat down at a different table, so I thought it wasn’t to be.
When I realised she was my date after all — the waitress had put us on different tables by mistake — I was really pleased. We soon got talking and covered the usual topics such as families and work. We also touched a little on previous relationships.
I thought Susan was very attractive, but unfortunately I could quickly tell that from her side there was no spark. I think she was put off when she asked if I was sporty. I said no, and I could see her face fall.
I do think I’m fit and healthy with the mental attitude of someone half my age, and on no medication whatsoever.
I’m pretty proud of that as I know a lot of guys my age start the day with a cocktail of pills.
The most important thing to me is my family, which takes precedence over all. I have three grown-up daughters, three stepchildren, 23 grandchildren and two great-grandchildren.
I may not be sporty but I’m not a slob. I like sailing and play golf, so I’m not a couch potato, but it’s still not enough for Susan.
It’s a real shame, as I had been really looking forward to the date. My partner and I were together for 26 years before we parted 12 years ago. I didn’t feel like dating for about four years after that.
After a couple of short-term relationships, one of which ended three years ago, I haven’t bothered much since. Online dating isn’t for me, and I haven’t actively been looking, really.
We talked away and the food was lovely, although it wasn’t a great spot for a first date as it was fairly noisy with families.
However, over the course of the evening I became more and more aware she wasn’t feeling a spark, which was rather disheartening.
Sadly, her lack of interest was confirmed when we walked to the car park and I suggested we go for a drink sometime.
She just muttered something noncommittal and drove off pretty speedily!
It hasn’t put me off dating again, but I would prefer to meet someone through friends.
It’s harder at this age to think of people fitting into your life. I’m fairly independent and I doubt I would want to live with someone again unless they were very, very special. I’ve been on my own for 12 years, so I’d need to be trained, or is that retrained?
I would have gone out with Susan again to see how things progressed, but it was clear there would be no second date.
LIKES: She was very pleasant and attractive REGRETS: None.
CAB/COFFEE: Coffee. VERDICT: 8/10
Maybe I’m fussy. But I know what I want – and it’s not him I was painfully aware that she wasn’t interested