Modern dates leave 3 in 4 women feeling chivalry is dead

WOMEN may not want a knight in shining armour any more – but they’d still like a date to behave like a gentleman.

Instead, nearly three- quarters think that chivalry is dead, a survey has found.

While traditional acts of courtesy like helping a woman put on her coat or pulling out a chair for her are now mostly seen as outdated, women hoped gestures of ‘modern chivalry’ would have replaced them.

Men calling when they say they will topped the list of these acts of politeness that women most want, cited by 84 per cent. A similar number expect a partner to check they got home safely after a date.

Good communication is clearly central to modern chivalry – as four in five also said they want to receive attentive texts during the day, and expect phones to be turned off during dates. But 73 per cent of single women polled are being left bitterly disappointed and said their dating experiences have made them fear chivalry is dead.

Two thirds – 65 per cent – complained of being ‘ghosted’ by a love interest, which is when they suddenly cuts off all communication with no warning.

Others complained of ‘breadcrumbing’, a new term that describes when someone contacts you only intermittently in order to keep you interested without expending much effort. Another common problem was ‘benching’ – like being put on the bench in a sports match – where someone sidelines a love interest while they look for a better option.

The survey of more than 500 women of all ages was carried out for dating site Match. com. Vicky Pavitt, of the website, said: ‘What the research shows is that women are starting to lose faith in modern dating. From breadcrumbing to benching, it can be easy to feel disenchanted.’

Other acts of courtesy women said they’d like to see from a love interest included picking her up for a date, letting her use his phone when her battery runs out, and acting keen to meet her friends and family, which were all cited by three quarters of those surveyed.

And in a sign of true Britishness, 72 per cent said it is important he knows how she likes her tea. Meanwhile four in ten said that they think it is outdated for a man to help a woman put on her coat or pull out a chair for her, while 45 per cent said it was old-fashioned to insist on her ordering first in a restaurant.