Stop send­ing me friend re­quests on Face­book — I’ll never ac­cept!

Daily Mail - - Life -

SeTH DAker, 18, has just started a de­gree in ar­chi­tec­ture at the Univer­sity of northum­bria and lives with mum nicky, 49, a nurse, and step­fa­ther Danny, 46, a re­movals com­pany owner, in rip­pon­den, West york­shire.


1 Want to know my first thought if ever I’m in­jured play­ing foot­ball? not, ‘Is my leg ac­tu­ally bro­ken?’, it’s ‘Oh, God, Mum’s go­ing to run onto the pitch any minute shout­ing: “are you OK dar­ling?” ’ You al­ways do, and it’s so em­bar­rass­ing. 2When­ever

you call me us­ing your hands-free de­vice, you al­most deafen me. You’re con­vinced you have to shout be­cause you’re fur­ther away from the hand­set. I’ve told you, there are speak­ers. You really don’t need to bel­low like a lu­natic. 3WhY

do you still call me ‘Sethy’ in front of my friends, your pet name for me since I was lit­tle, even though you know I get teased? It can’t be ac­ci­den­tal.


when you’re in a good mood, you’ll of­fer me a lift to see friends — and then com­plain the whole jour­ney I treat you like a ‘taxi ser­vice’. 5It’S

so frus­trat­ing when you call me when I’m out at night, and no one else is home, to ask how to work the tv. no mat­ter how of­ten we ex­plain it to you, you just can’t fig­ure it out for your­self. how many times am I to be found in the foyer of a pub, shout­ing: ‘Press the red but­ton. no, the red one!’ be­cause Mum is miss­ing coro­na­tion Street. 6I

KnOW you’re proud of me, but you have this hor­ri­ble habit of boast­ing about me to my friends’ moth­ers, then they give me stick about what you’ve said. hon­estly, I’m really not as great as you think. 7I

reallY don’t mind try­ing out your new treat­ments at your aes­thet­ics clinic. What I do mind, how­ever, is you post­ing pic­tures of me wear­ing face masks on your Face­book page, which is plain hu­mil­i­at­ing. 8I’ll

ask if you need help with pre­par­ing din­ner and am al­ways told: ‘no, it’s all in hand.’ then, later, you’re bang­ing on that you have ‘to do ev­ery­thing’! 9MuM,

I learned to tell the time when I was six. Your lit­tle morn­ing trick telling me it’s later than it is, hop­ing it will speed me up, is just point­less. 10PleaSe

stop send­ing re­quests to be my ‘friend’ on so­cial me­dia — twit­ter, In­sta­gram, Face­book, Snapchat. I love you, but I will never ac­cept them. Who on earth wants their mum spy­ing on their nights out?


Oh, hOld me back! Seth’s at univer­sity and I miss him, so I’d love to see what he’s up to, but he’s blocked me on so­cial me­dia — even when I pay for his phone. how is that fair?

I really don’t ob­ject to cook­ing a meal. What I do mind is Seth invit­ing a friend to stay for din­ner, then an­nounc­ing, just as I am serv­ing up, that our guest has halal or veg­e­tar­ian diet re­quire­ments, and be­ing ex­pected to deal with it. that said, he’s not a bad lad, and I really don’t have much to com­plain about.

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from UK

© PressReader. All rights reserved.