The dastardly Mr Deedes

Our headmasterly Lord Mayor of London, Andrew Parmley, has a novel way of getting rid of visitors to his Mansion House office who’ve outstayed their welcome. Whenever a meeting runs over, a member of staff enters and informs him the Archbishop of Canterbury is on the telephone. Parmley, 61 says: ‘When that happens, I say “Thank you for coming. It’s been a pleasure, but I’ve got to go.”’ Ingenious! Quick suggestion: ‘Sir Philip Green’s ranting on line one,’ might get them scarpering even quicker. Humourless Channel 4 executive – and ex-BBC journalist – Jay Hunt’s defection to Apple means we can rule her out of the running for James Harding’s soon-to-be vacated head of news position at the Beeb. How do hacks at Broadcasting House feel about that? ‘Sizeably relieved,’ mouths one. Departing London Stock Exchange boss Xavier Rolet, 57, subject of some needlessly OTT testimonials lately, is now named among the Harvard Business Review’s 100 best-performing bosses. Compare stately Xavier’s cosy predicament with his German counterpart, Carsten Kengeter, who’s leaving Deutsche Boerse amid accusations – strenuously denied – of insider trading. To think, only months ago Herr Kengeter, 50, was poised to take Rolet’s job in the two organisations’ proposed £21bn merger. Fate can be a cruel mistress. ITV lounge lizard Robert Peston, 57, tweets a picture of himself signing (somewhat presumptuously?) hundreds of copies of his soon-to-be released tome WTF, which discusses Brexit and other seismic economic events of the past two years. Reminds me of that old publishing gag about the second-hand bookseller seen advertising a ‘rare, unsigned copy’ of Ted Heath’s self-regarding memoirs. Embossed on the top of highly regarded fund manager and East End bruiser Terry Smith’s business cards is the characteristically no-nonsense slogan: ‘Buy Good Companies. Don’t Overpay. Do Nothing.’ As Compare The Market’s raffish Meerkat Aleksandr might say: ‘Simples!’