TRIALS OF TRINNY

I CAN hardly wait to read Trinny Woodall’s soon-to-be-published life story in which she reveals the tragedies of divorce, financial meltdown and finally finding happiness — in the arms of her multimillionaire boyfriend Charles Saatchi, 74.

Not a self-help guide for us ordinary folk is it, love?

INTERVIEWING our most famous astronaut, Tim Peake, This Morning’s Amanda Holden asked if he’d nicked a bit of the Moon as a souvenir. The only problem was that no one’s been there since 1972. Tim spent six months aboard the International Space Station orbiting in deep space. And no, the deep space wasn’t between vacuous Amanda’s ears.

FATS Domino was married to his childhood sweetheart for 61 years, had eight children and lived his entire life in New Orleans. After his death this week, a friend described him as ‘warm, fun-loving, spiritual, creative and humble — you don’t get more New Orleans than that’. A fitting epitaph for both this magnificent man and his magical city.

IT COULD only have been a Liverpool fan who decided Wayne Rooney — who plays for rivals Everton — should do penance for his drink-driving by painting park benches in Macclesfield. But given that Coleen is on her umpteenth hol this year — and not wearing her wedding ring — perhaps they should have got him painting dog houses instead.