WHAT DO I DO? I’M ROY . . . THE IRISH TEA BOY!
ROY KEANE is not one for making friends and he was not about to indulge the advances of a Dane inside the Republic of Ireland camp. He will encourage his players to adopt the same mentality in the first leg of their World Cup play-off in Denmark on Saturday. ‘What would you say to Peter Schmeichel ahead of the game?’ asked a Danish reporter. Keane, eyes narrowing, said: ‘To Peter? I would say f*** all to him. What do you want me to say to him? He’s not playing. I don’t keep in touch with Peter.’ The former Manchester United captain then referenced his infamous fight with Schmeichel on a tour of Asia in 1998. ‘He started it,’ said Keane, unprompted, seemingly proud of the headbutt which left Schmeichel with a black eye. ‘He said it himself, he held his hand up. I think he had two pints and got a bit brave.’ Speaking of bravery, it was before the Republic’s win in Wales last month that former international and TV pundit Eamon Dunphy, the man who ghosted Keane’s first autobiography, called the assistant boss a ‘cabaret act’, questioning what he brings to the team. What did Keane make of that? ‘I’ve been called worse. Stuff like that doesn’t keep me awake at night,’ he said. So what does he bring to the Ireland set-up? ‘Very little!’ said Keane, perhaps mocking Dunphy’s suggestion. ‘Honestly, we don’t do too much. A bit of light training. I’m not sure what I’m doing here to be honest with you. I make lots of tea. I said that before and people joked, but I do make lots of tea. What else? Not too much.’ Keane does make a difference. He and manager Martin O’Neill are the reason Ireland are within two games of next summer’s finals in Russia. The pair are set to sign a two-year contract extension for the Euro 2020 qualifying campaign, but Keane, the former Sunderland and Ipswich boss, does not like the suggestion that the role is safer for him than a club job. ‘Safe? Secure? Comfortable? Those are not great traits to have in a job,’ said Keane. ‘You need an edge, the pressure of these games. If I wanted a safe and secure job I would work in the media a bit more.’