4. MORE IS . . . MORE!

NEXT, I adorn the wide, flat top. ‘Use fake flowers twined around the branches or presents,’ says Rachel. I settle on a large lit-up star (£13.50, sainsburys.co.uk) and presents. At the base, Lagerfeld used a sheepskin rug, while I opt for a cream fluffy one (£29.99, homebase.co.uk). If I’d used a real tree, I would have had to suspend it from the ceiling using hooks and wire. ‘And it would droop,’ says Rachel, ‘so you’d need something like those green orchid canes to hold the branches in place. I don’t advise trying this unless you’re an expert carpenter.’