Our baby’s gift of life
Pregnant mother knows daughter won’t survive ... but she’s giving birth anyway so girl’s organs can help save others
WHEN Hayley Martin was told 20 weeks into her pregnancy that the child she is carrying has no chance of surviving, she was devastated.
A scan revealed that the baby girl does not have kidneys or a bladder and will die during labour or just after birth.
But instead of terminating the pregnancy to avoid the trauma of a stillbirth, Mrs Martin has decided to carry on to full term – so that she can donate her daughter’s viable organs and give other babies a chance to live.
She and her husband Scott hope their baby, already named Ava- Joy, will live on in the children she saves.
Mrs Martin has also vowed to donate one of her own kidneys in honour of her daughter as soon as she has recovered from the birth.
She said: ‘Our child is going to die no matter what, but if we can try and save somebody else, the grief we are going through, it will all be worth it.
‘It was not an easy decision but it was the right decision and it has helped me cope with the heartbreak. A part of her will live on, she won’t be completely gone. She will be alive in somebody else.
‘I have days where I can get through the day and I’m fine. Then there are days when I break down and all I do is cry because I can’t do anything to save my child.’
Mr and Mrs Martin, from Hull, who are both 30 and already have three children, were thrilled to learn they were expecting another baby earlier this year. But at the 20-week scan they were told Ava- Joy has a rare genetic disorder called bilateral renal agenesis. She does not have kidneys or a bladder, and her lungs are so underdeveloped she will never be able to breathe.
Mrs Martin said: ‘I was in floods of tears. I nearly collapsed on the way out to our car. I was in shock. Every time I went for a scan I was desperately hoping they were wrong. You can’t feel anything other than numb.’
She and her husband did not take long to decide against a termination. Mrs Martin added: ‘I will be sad when she’s born because I know that every moment will be getting closer to her passing away. It’s heartbreaking. I see other pregnant mums happily expecting and I feel such sorrow.
‘Even walking past pregnant women on the street or seeing babies in the supermarket can leave me in floods of
Rare genetic disorder: Scan of Ava-Joy in the womb tears. But I am determined to ‘choking’ when he found out create something positive out Ava- Joy’s fate. of this agonising experience. He said: ‘We went home
‘I also know there will be that night and couldn’t say a babies out there who could word to each other. have a chance of life with Ava‘Hayley went upstairs and Joy’s healthy organs. Why sank into the bed, just lying should two babies die if one there in the dark. can be saved?’ ‘ The only thing we had
The baby will have to bought for Ava- Joy at the weigh a minimum of five and time was a white baby a half pounds to become a blanket. Hayley has slept donor. Doctors say it is likely with it every night since we that she will be able to pass found out.’ on her heart valves, liver cells Ava- Joy’s due date is January and pancreas. 25 but it is likely she will
Her parents, who have be induced in Christmas week daughters Kiowa, seven, and so that she is not stillborn. Layla, five, as well as twoyear-old If she doesn’t pass away son Oliver, will then during labour, doctors are write letters to the recipients hoping Mr and Mrs Martin to thank them for helping will have at least a few their daughter live on. moments with their daughter
Mr Martin, an events firstaider, while she is still alive. said he felt like he was Mrs Martin said: ‘Even if I
Coping with the heartbreak: Hayley Martin and her husband Scott get just one second of her opening her little eyes and looking at me, that would be a moment that no one can ever take away from me.’
When she passes away her organs and tissue will be retrieved and she will then be put in a ‘cuddle cot’ which cools the baby’s body and prolongs the amount of time parents can spend with their dead child.
The couple will be able to dress Ava- Joy in the outfits they have bought for her and take photographs.
Mrs Martin added: ‘I don’t feel like a hero. I’m doing it because it is something that I’ve always been taught – treat others how you wish to be treated.
‘As a family it has made us a heck of a lot stronger.’
‘There are days when all I do is cry’