England’s dire planning

ENgLAND’S attack went for 662 runs at Perth in Australia’s only innings, so it is another example of scandalously poor Ashes planning that they did not have a proper bowling coach there.

New Zealander Shane Bond stood in for the first two Tests because Essex refused to release Chris Silverwood. He takes up the full-time job after the Ashes. But in Perth, England fielding coach Paul Collingwood supplemented his responsibilities by taking charge of the bowlers. His expertise extends to 17 Test wickets at an average of 59.88.

GRAEME

SWANN, abject pundit for BT Sport and Test Match Special, reached a new low during the Perth Test when he blamed the media for England’s defeats. He said there had been too much negativity and wants our coverage to be more like the Aussies’ one-eyed Channel Nine. Jonathan Agnew’s stature as the lead commentator on

TMS was greatly enhanced during his absence from Perth, with wife Emma fighting cancer. There was far less authority, especially when Dan Norcross had the mic.

THE BBC have reprimanded relic Radio 5 Live commentator Alan green, who was never going to get away with saying Leicester’s Jamie Vardy had ‘got the childminder back’ following wife Rebekah’s return from I’m A Celebrity... Get Me

Out Of Here! in Australia. Beeb bosses had words with the unreconstructed green at half-time during Leicester’s 3-0 defeat against Crystal Palace and he was forced to apologise for his ‘choice of words’.