The dastardly Mr Deedes

Cross- dressing potter Grayson Perry recently gave a talk at the Bank of England, part of a series of guest seminars introduced since Mark Carney, 52, became governor. I’m told Perry, 57, delivered his address inside the old Lady of Threadneedle street dressed as his alter-ego Claire, in trademark blonde bob, flasher’s overcoat and fishnets. one can but wonder what Carney’s baronial predecessor Lord (Mervyn) King must make of it all.

Apropos Carney: his appearance in front of the Treasury Select Committee was plunged into darkness when the lights suddenly went out. In the brutal world of stand-up comedy this is an abrupt way of telling a performer they’ve droned on, though I’m told in this case a brief power failure was to blame.

Former KPMG chairman sir Alan Reid received his last audience with the Queen this week before relinquishing his role as Keeper of the Privy Purse. What next for the inscrutable scot, 70? A long and lucrative retirement if he chose to emulate his bald predecessor sir Michael Peat, 68, who’s gobbled up directorships galore since hanging up his hosiery.

Appearing on Radio 4’s media show yesterday, scoop-prone journalist Robert Peston denied relying on his ex-Financial Times colleagues, City spinner Roland Rudd and Dow Jones chief Will Lewis, for stories. ‘They’re mates,’ he remarked dismissively. Peston, 57, did admit he had a source in the 90s who was ‘fantastically helpful to me on a number of spectacular stories’. Host Amol Rajan asked: ‘Was it Ed Balls?’ Peston: ‘I’m not going to say who it was.’ Rajan: ‘Was it Ed Balls?’ Peston (erupting) ‘I’m not going to say who it was!’ I’m guessing it was Ed.

Chisel-jawed BT boss Gavin Patterson, 50, whose annus horribilis has left his £1.34m-a-year job dangling by the shortest of threads, has agreed to be keynote speaker at the Mobile World Congress in Barcelona next March. I am reminded of the old credit crunch gag, which defined optimism as a banker who irons five shirts on a sunday.