My new game’s a winner, you know

THERE’S a new game I’ve invented called Sevens — not to be confused with the card game of that name. It can be for any number of players aged from five to 85. All you need is a TV, a tumbler and an armchair or settee with a foot rest to make the player comfy. The glass tumbler is, in my case, for cheap whisky, but others can please themselves. I play this while ‘her’ in the kitchen prepares the evening meal (and don’t be distracted by objects hitting the slate floor or the pungent aromas of oven-ready chips being burnt black). Switch on the TV by using the remote control, enabling you to stay in a comfortable reclining position. I like The One Show, but the programme isn’t important. And a radio does just as well. The idea of the game is to start counting in a low voice — gradually increasing in volume — the number of times you hear someone say ‘you know’. In just a minute or two, as the liquid in the glass gets lower, the number of ‘you knows’ will reach seven. That’s when I shout ‘Seven!’ — imitating the former Strictly judge. If dinner is not ready by this time, well, you know, I just start all over again.

Wally Rainbow, Whitland, Carmarthenshire.