Gizza job

ME anD Dave were wondering if we could help out with some of the jobs what have become available due to the collapse of that Carry on firm, sorry, Carillion.

We could take over some contracts as Dave has a white van and i’ve got a cordless drill with two batteries. Dave knows all about roads and Tarmac and i’m good with glue and screwing things together.

Please don’t offer us anything involving ladders, as we don’t do heights and we’ve got dodgy knees.

We’d want paying in advance (cash is best) so we could go to B&Q and get the materials, but as they’ve got a sale on we could save the Government a bit of money.

ideally, we’d prefer to do jobs near home, but we are prepared to travel and stay at Premier inns as long as we can have the full breakfast. We both have health-and-safety bits of paper what we copied from t’internet, so you can rest easy we’d do a good job.

GRAHAM HAYDEN, Hayes, Kent.