POINT

÷ BORIS’S Bridge has a nice ring to it, as long as it’s a drawbridge under our control!

T. McDONALD-DORMAN, Darlington, Co. Durham.

÷ A BRIDGE between England and France? It’s proved to be an impossible job to build a bridge between England and the Isle of Wight.

TRUDY DRAPER, East Grinstead, W. Sussex.

÷ EVIAN has pledged to make all its plastic bottles recyclable. Ask for an Evian in a French restaurant and it’s served in a glass bottle.

ALAN DEWFALL, Melksham, Wilts.

÷ I CAN’T believe Prince William paid £180 for a buzzcut. He should buy Kate some £40 clippers and get her to do the job.

ROD WATTS, Market Rasen, Lincs.

÷ PRINCE WILLIAM’S new haircut? I’ve seen more hair on a piece of toffee.

GEORGE VALENTINE, Rotherham, S. Yorks.

÷ WORRIED about a statue of Margaret Thatcher being vandalised? Just put it on top of a 200ft column.

RON TODD, Yate, Glos.

÷ HAD Sir Desmond Swayne nodded off in the House of Lords, it would have gone unnoticed.

K. O. JONES, Rockferry, Wirral.

÷ A BIG thank-you to James Norton for providing temporary respite from Poldark.

Ms B. MATHER, South Brent, Devon.

÷ IF WE are going to pay £45 million more to stop migrants at Calais, we should fine France for every one that sneaks across the Channel.

ELAINE DAVIES, Ruislip, Middlesex. FOR permission to copy cuttings for internal management and information purposes, please contact the Newspaper Licensing Agency (NLA), PO Box 101, Tunbridge Wells TN1 1WX. Tel: 01892 525273. e-mail: copy@nla.co.uk