THE DASRARDLY MR DEEDES

Santander chairman Shriti Vadera has informed AstraZeneca she’ll retire from its board in December, allowing the formidable ex-business minister, 55, more time to focus on her day job. Some wonder if her considerable talents might be better served over at the Bank of England. With Financial Conduct Authority boss Andrew Bailey’s stock dwindling, there’s a lack of compelling candidates to replace Mark Carney next year. The mere thought of Governor Vadera should get the Threadneedle Street stiffs hopping quicker than a cattle prod down the jockstrap. Congratulations to Buxom Apprentice star Lady Brady, 49, vicePresident of struggling West Ham, who’s passed her British Sign Language course with flying colours. No sign language skills required to decipher the angry gesticulations West Ham fans enjoy throwing in her direction. Coca- Cola’s clog-wearing European general manager Leendert Den Hollander, 48, is asked by The Grocer to name his favourite moment, to which he replies: ‘Now, enjoying the moment.’ (Cringe) Best advice? ‘Keep it simple.’ (Groan) Favourite book? ‘Anything by John Grisham.’ (Yawn) Favourite film? ‘The Shawshank Redemption.’ (Have executives ever seen another film?) Possibly not one of life’s sparklers. Oily Mark Karpeles, 32, French-born boss of Bitcoin exchange firm Mt. Gox, reveals he shed six stone in four months while residing in a Tokyo jail in 2015 as police probed his firm’s demise. His daily diet was just two pieces of bread and some jam. I can think of a few City trenchermen whose health wouldn’t suffer from a stay inside a Japanese cell. The Financial Times recently gave space to a glowing profile of bumptious Culture Secretary Matt Hancock, 39, which quoted anonymous sources describing him as ‘ Decisive’, ‘Incredibly enthusiastic’, ‘A guy who’s got lots of energy’ who ‘maxes out what you can achieve with the office you have.’ Another remarked: ‘Underestimate him at your peril.’ Generous words for possibly the most disliked man in Westminster. I’m sure it’s a co-coincidence that the following week, the Government confirmed FT editor Lionel Barber’s appointment as chairman of the Tate Galleries.