Portrait of pomposity

Yesterday, on 20th anniversary of the Good Friday Agreement, Blair and Clinton still think it’s all about them...

Like a cheesy showbiz act enjoying one last turn at the end of the pier, the two old hoofers were thrilled to be back.

exactly 20 years on from the Good Friday Agreement, all the main players in that painful process were reunited in Belfast yesterday to mark two decades of what passes for normality in these parts.

No surprises for guessing who hogged the limelight.

Northern ireland might have gone 15 months without a government, its assembly irreconcilably split over gay rights and old enmities while the eU treats its future like a Brexit football and brazen murderers walk the streets unpunished. But never mind, folks, because everyone’s favourite duo were back in town with a look that said it all: ‘Y’know, folks, it’s all about us.’

Bill Clinton and Tony Blair had been invited to address a conference of politicians, civic worthies and, of course, children. Old ‘kids-are-our-future’ Blair never could do a gig without a coachload of cherubic faces.

Mr Clinton certainly sounded as if he was addressing a room full of nine- year- olds as he reminded the world he has lost none of his rare talent for ‘aw shucks’ platitudes.

‘The Good Friday Agreement is the work of genius that’s applicable if you care at all about preserving democracy,’ he told a packed hall at Queen’s University, leaving them to work out which genius he had in mind. ‘These people gave you a gift,’ he twinkled. ‘People who lost loved ones and bore scars, the women’s groups – everybody. They gave you a gift. Make the most of it. it is a precious gift.’

Profound words of wisdom to help these simple souls through the errors of their ways. ‘Remember you inspired the world 20 years ago, you can do it all over again because the rest of the world continues to do foolish things. You do smart things.’

Suitably patronised and patted on the head, the audience was treated to a homily from Tony Blair on the issue which consumes his every waking moment. ‘i’m passionately opposed to Brexit. i think it is a profound mistake,’ he said. ‘We should do our best to circumvent it.’

On either side sat the George and Ringo of the Good Friday Agreement – US Senator George Mitchell and Bertie Ahern. Centre stage, though, was reserved for the Lennon and McCartney of late 20th Century geo-politics.

No doubt they’ll be back for the 30th. in the meantime, the grateful people of Northern ireland can get on with nurturing their ‘precious gift’.