Pushy parents ‘putting exam results before child’s health’
PuSHY parents are putting academic success ahead of their children’s health and happiness, according to a private school headmistress.
Helen Lowe warned of the risks of signing youngsters up to extra tutoring sessions just because other parents are doing so.
She said some children are being ‘corralled’ into weekly maths and English classes lasting two to three hours to help them pass entrance exams to leading schools.
Many independent schools have entrance exams for children aged 11, seven and in some cases four. It has led to some parents spending thousands on private tuition to improve their children’s chances. In a message to parents, Mrs Lowe, head of Bute House Preparatory School in Hammersmith, west London, said: ‘I do understand that making sure our children are happy, healthy and successful is the reason you get up in the morning.
‘But I, along with other heads and teachers in both prep and senior education, am very worried that the health and happiness of children is too often now at the bottom of that list; being academically successful, no matter what it takes, is firmly at the top for some.’
The head teacher said school entrance exams, in some cases for children as young as three or four, take place throughout the year.
‘Such is the concern around achieving success in these, some parents corral their children into weekly two or three-hourly maths and English sessions, in order to prepare them,’ she wrote in Attain, a magazine for the independent sector.
Bute House is an independent day school for girls aged four to 11 with fees of £15,000 a year. It selects children aged four by ballot, but has an entrance exam for seven-year-olds.
Mrs Lowe said parents naturally want their child to fulfil their potential, and for many this means that their child will work hard, do their best and be ‘supported wholeheartedly’ at home.
She continued: ‘But for some parents, this is not enough. They fear that if they do not give their child extra help, usually in the form of either group or individual tutoring, their child cannot achieve; their reasoning is that, if everyone else is doing that then they must do it too or they are letting their child down.’
Mrs Lowe suggested that parents need to be honest with themselves about why they are doing this, adding: ‘The children are in danger of being given the message that they are not quite making the grade; that their own hard work and efforts are not quite enough.’
Parents should focus on spending time with their children, which was ‘far more powerful than any session with a tutor’.
‘Corralled into tutoring sessions’