Wedding woes

MEGHAN’S reclusive father, Thomas, began his journey from his Mexico home for the royal Wedding, staying at a £50-a-night joint in San Diego. he stopped at a 7-eleven for a can of heineken and some gas-X tablets, which offer fast relief from bloating. Weird, isn’t it, that his daughter is forking out £100,000 for her wedding dress, yet dad is slumming it in a cheap motel?

RUM news that Fergie hasn’t been invited to Harry and Meghan’s evening reception for their 250 most intimate friends. Who on earth will top the worstdressed list now?

ONe of Meghan’s friends reveals her bible for snaring a rich man was a dating book called The rules. Ninaki Priddy says Meghan always had marriage in mind, whatever man she met, and would imagine what the relationship would be like in ten years’ time. That’s easy now: a couple of kids, a bald husband, 4,625 excruciatingly dull royal events behind her — and withering with boredom.