Ephraim Hardcastle
MEGHAN may be a princess, duchess, countess and baroness but, as Rodgers and Hammerstein observed, there’s nothing like a dame. Soon we will have Dame Megs. I’m informed she will be made a Dame Grand Cross of the Order of the Crown when she visits Tonga in October. Harry will pick up his second knighthood at the same time (to go with his KCVO). But they’re not expected to return with any ironmongery from either Australia or New Zealand, which both have republican leaders. SINCE Prince Philip, 97, carried out his final official engagement last August, the Queen has spent a busy year without a consort at her side. The plan of pairing the Queen with Charles for big events never got off the ground. Each time he takes his father’s place – as he did looking bored stiff at last year’s state opening of Parliament – it downgrades Camilla in the public eye and stiffens opinion against her crowning as Queen when the time comes. It’s also a tacit admission that Philip, enjoying his retirement out of the limelight, is irreplaceable. PLAYING a fictional home secretary in the new BBC1 thriller Bodyguard, actress Keeley Hawes, 42, admits studying closely the mannerisms and performance of Amber Rudd, 55, both pictured, saying: ‘At the time [of filming] Amber was home secretary and we were aware there might be parallels that were going to be drawn.’ Surely a mistake then to describe Keeley’s home secretary, in the script, as a ‘total cow’ and ‘sociopath’. DURING a TV appearance with her father, Camilla Cleese, 34, recalls of the Fawlty Towers star: ‘You told me I was purchased at Harrods and I believed that for years… when I was bad, you pulled that big Harrods bag out of the closet and chased me around: “You’re going back… I’ll return you!” I was terrified.’ Sweet memories! FRUITY TALKRADIO host Julia HartleyBrewer, 50, responds to the BBC’s Gabby Logan, 45, calling for a second vote on the final Brexit deal, tweeting: ‘Ooh, look, another highly paid BBC presenter comes out as a Remoaner. But there *definitely* isn’t an orchestrated, well-funded Establishment campaign to stop Brexit. Absolutely not. No sirree.’ Noting Logan’s subsequent claims that ‘as a mum and a citizen I’m getting more and more worried about the way Brexit is going’, HartleyBrewer fires back: ‘As a mum and as a citizen I’m getting more and more worried about the way the EU is going.’ THE Queen’s former personal chef Darren McGrady reveals grouse shooting at Balmoral will not start until five days after the Glorious Twelfth: ‘The hot weather killed so many chicks on the estate that shoots have been restricted.’ He adds mischeviously: ‘Chicken again, Ma’am?’