Satellite choice
CHILDREN’S CHOICE Apple & Onion, 10am, 12 noon, 5.30pm, Cartoon Network
THIS is an American show, but it has a very British feel. The marvellously subtle Richard Ayoade provides the voice of Onion, one half of a duo who embark on quietly surreal, amusing adventures in a world where walking, talking fruit and vegetables are the norm. (Sky 601, Virgin 704)
FAIRYTALE FANTASY Mirror Mirror, 2.45pm, Film4
LILY COLLINS stars in this positive reimagining of Snow White, with Julia Roberts as her wicked stepmother. It looks scrummy, with Armie Hammer co-starring as a prince in need of rescue.
COSY DRAMA Hamish Macbeth, 6pm, True Entertainment
THE offbeat Nineties drama about an easy-going policeman in the north of Scotland begins a weekday repeat from the first episode. Robert Carlyle plays the lead in low-key style, and his first case involves Macbeth probing the theft of salt from a grocer.
LIVE FOOTBALL Manchester United v Tottenham Hotspur, 7pm, Sky Premier League/Main Event
EVERYTHING is far from rosy in Jose Mourinho’s garden. The United manager has been in a bad mood even before the season began, which a 3-2 loss to Brighton last time out did nothing to improve. The last thing he needs is the visit of an in-form Spurs side who have won both their opening fixtures. Will poor Jose have something to cheer come the final whistle?
STAR BIOPIC This Is Bob Hope, 7.50pm, PBS America
BILLY CRYSTAL reads the writings of the great entertainer in this new profile, which also features contributions from Hope’s daughter, Linda, and Kermit the frog. The skills of the British-born Hope ensured he succeeded at whatever he tried, be it on stage, TV or film.
DRAMA GRAND FINALE Sharp Objects, 9pm, Sky Atlantic
SEEING Sharp Objects as a murder mystery is a mistake — it’s a drama that slowly reveals the reality of a horribly twisted family situation. We’ve viewed the fallout of that situation all series without realising and, in tonight’s finale, we find out what’s next for Camille (Amy Adams) et al.
GRAND TOUR Phil Spencer’s Stately Homes, 9pm, More4
PHIL SPENCER is at Norfolk’s Houghton Hall, which was built in the 18th century for Robert Walpole, Britain’s first Prime Minister. The big mystery here is the price tag — Walpole kept how much Houghton cost (and how he raised the money) a secret, but it looks as if it was a fortune . . .
GRITTY TALE Vikings,g, 10pm,p, 5Spike p
GABRIEL BYRNE is the leader of the Norsemen in this big, bloody historical drama, which turns upon their invasion of England. It has a grim swagger that pulls you in and only gets more ambitious. This is the first episode, with Travis Fimmel as Ragnar and Katheryn Winnick as Lagertha (pictured). (Freeview 31, Freesat 141, Sky 150, Virgin 154)
ROMANTIC COMEDY The Competition, 10pm, Sky Premiere
BLOGGER Lauren (American Beauty’s Thora Birch) advocates a formula to avoid infidelity — mainly by quitting relationships after six months. Chris Klein is the guy out to prove she’s wrong.