Bu­ble: My son’s cancer at 3 made me want to die

Daily Mail - - PETER OBORNE - By Susie Coen TV and Ra­dio Re­porter

SINGER Michael Bu­ble has re­vealed the dev­as­tat­ing emo­tional im­pact on his fam­ily of his young son’s bat­tle with liver cancer.

In a sear­ing in­ter­view, the star said of the di­ag­no­sis when Noah was three: ‘You just want to die. I don’t even know how I was breath­ing.

‘My wife was the same and even though I was the stronger of the two of us, I wasn’t strong. My wife was … I’m sorry, I can’t make it to the end of that sen­tence.’

Bu­ble, 43, and his wife, Ar­gen­tinian ac­tress Luisana Lopi­lato, 31, have two younger chil­dren: Elias, two, and 11-week-old Vida. The cou­ple both put their ca­reers on hold af­ter Noah’s di­ag­no­sis in 2016.

Bu­ble says he took the sting out of Noah’s treat­ment with hu­mour, telling Daily Mail Week­end magazine: ‘I never called it the hos­pi­tal, I called it the fun ho­tel. And ev­ery day I got ex­tra bed sheets and I’d build a tent for Noah. I just made the best of it. Sur­vival.’

With five-year-old Noah’s cancer now in re­mis­sion, Bu­ble says he is ques­tion­ing ev­ery­thing about his life and is plan­ning to quit his mu­sic ca­reer af­ter the re­lease of his new record, called Love.

‘Why are we here? Is this all there is? Be­cause if this is all there is, there has to be some­thing big­ger,’ he said. ‘It’s been such a dif­fi­cult ex­er­cise. It hurts me and it hurts me to talk about Noah be­cause it’s not my story to tell, it’s his.

‘But my whole be­ing’s changed. My per­cep­tion of life. I don’t know if I can even get through this con­ver­sa­tion with­out cry­ing. And I’ve never lost con­trol of my emo­tions in pub­lic.’ Bu­ble has won four Gram­mys and sold 75mil­lion records. Be­fore Noah’s ill­ness, he said, he would worry about ticket sales, tours and how the pub­lic saw him, but now he has be­come ‘em­bar­rassed by my ego’.

‘I de­cided I’ll never read my name again in print, never read a re­view, and I never have. I de­cided I’d never use so­cial me­dia again, and I never have,’ he added.

‘I don’t have the stom­ach for it any more. The celebrity nar­cis­sism. This is my last in­ter­view. I’m re­tir­ing … I’ve made the per­fect record and now I can leave at the very top.’

Close fam­ily: Michael Bu­ble with wife Luisana and sons Noah and Elias

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