Daily Mail

Will Kelvin’s scintillat­ing samba be the saving of Strictly?

As a million desert show for the amateurs’ dancing debuts...

- JAN MOIR View from the sofa

STRICTLY Come Dancing returned on Saturday with BBC One’s traditiona­l season opener – aka the show that never ends. It started at 7pm and staggered towards a finale of sorts 140 minutes later.

You could have roasted an ox in that time. You could have knitted a hat, bleached your teeth, had five vasectomie­s. Olympic rower James Cracknell danced as if he had gone for the latter option.

What is he even doing here? The double gold medallist has had his difficulti­es in the past and this year endured the very public break-up of his marriage.

Perhaps a quiet spell far from the madding cameras is what friends hoped for James, but no.

Here he is, shuffling through his first dance with the tortured expression of a man with a scorpion attached to his scrotum, in a performanc­e that was more death march than tango.

‘I’m sure you have inspired so many men at home to go out and find a dance studio,’ said judge Shirley Ballas afterwards.

Yes. And burn it to the ground. One could only cluck with admiration at his pluck.

As exhausted viewers ransacked cupboards and fridges for more alcohol, keeping their energy levels topped up with potatobase­d snacks, the show just went on and on.

Karim Somebody did a cha cha cha. A DJ called Dev shuffled through a foxtrot. Saffron the vlogger did a really rather marvellous tango.

Who are all these people? This is the 17th series of Strictly and top celebrity names seem to be particular­ly thin on the ground this year.

When the biggest star is Anneka Rice ( last seen on Celebrity Hunted and Rolf Paints), does that mean that the show is in trouble – especially when she mum- dances her way through that tricky first dance in a pair of plimsolls? Not quite. It is true that many of the pro dancers are now more famous than the so-called celebritie­s they have to partner.

Ultimately, however, the quality and appeal of Strictly is not based on the eminence of the stars who take part, but what happens to them when they step on to the ballroom floor.

That is the moment of truth. And that is why the stand- out dance this week – in fact one of the great Strictly moments of all time – came from Kelvin Fletcher.

He is a former Emmerdale actor – three words to get them rioting in the aisles – and a late replacemen­t for Made in Chelsea’s Jamie Laing, who had to withdraw from the series after sustaining an injury. A few days ago, Kelvin didn’t even know what a samba was. Some kinda liqueur thing with a flaming coffee bean in it, dunno, you tell me.

He has the body of a bloke who squat-thrusts with anvils strapped to his thighs. He is a champion race driver of Nissan cars and he once played the Tin Man in a Blackpool panto.

ALESS likely resume for a dancing sensation would be hard to imagine. Yet under the tutelage of pro dancer Oti Mabuse, Kelvin’s last-minute substitute samba was a thing of beauty.

He just threw himself into it, shimmying like a man possessed, his buttocks quivering like cymbals as the audience roared. ‘Ooh, look at you,’ cried dependably atrocious hostess Tess Daly, as she pawed Fletcher into place for his post- dance chat with the judges. ‘Take that booty upstairs, you dancing hunk,’ she told him, after they had delivered their glowing verdicts.

Oh Tess. The great mystery of Strictly Come Dancing is not how it survives and thrives on such a modest trickle of annual star power, but why you are still there after 17 long years.

Tess is so wooden she puts the eek in teak. She is utterly hopeless, with zero charisma and a startling inability to bond onscreen with contestant­s.

And from year to year, she never improves nor improvises nor impresses. Her continued appearance is one of the great mysteries of the showbiz age, alongside her doggedly larky cohost Claudia Winkleman. I can’t help but feel Strictly is a success in spite of the pair of them, not because of them.

Elsewhere new judge Motsi Mabuse (Oti’s sister) made a confident and winning debut, while Craig Revel Horwood, Shirley and Bruno Tonioli wasted no time in reprising their usual pantomime personas.

In what was a terrific opening show, Strictly proves that it still thrums with energy and spangled panache, maintainin­g its crown as family entertainm­ent of the highest quality.

Watching Kelvin amaze himself or RuPaul’s Drag Race judge Michelle Visage scorching across the ballroom in a fierce cha cha proves that there’s a little bit of craziness in dancing that does everyone a lot of good.

Is the show over yet? Has it finished? At last.

 ??  ?? THIS year’s Strictly Come Dancing series launched at the weekend amid the usual fanfare of glitter, sequins, joy and a few tears. But ratings for the first live episode were down by more than a million on last year.
An average of 7.7 million saw stars including James Cracknell, Anneka Rice and Kelvin Fletcher dance live for the first time – compared with 8.9 million viewers for the same episode last year. So is Strictly losing its sparkle? Here Jan Moir gives her verdict on BBC One’s Saturday night staple... Top scorers: Oti Mabuse and Kelvin Fletcher do the samba PS Judge Motsi Mabuse said before the show there would be no bias towards her sister. But her ‘8’ still helped Oti and Kelvin to top the leaderboar­d
THIS year’s Strictly Come Dancing series launched at the weekend amid the usual fanfare of glitter, sequins, joy and a few tears. But ratings for the first live episode were down by more than a million on last year. An average of 7.7 million saw stars including James Cracknell, Anneka Rice and Kelvin Fletcher dance live for the first time – compared with 8.9 million viewers for the same episode last year. So is Strictly losing its sparkle? Here Jan Moir gives her verdict on BBC One’s Saturday night staple... Top scorers: Oti Mabuse and Kelvin Fletcher do the samba PS Judge Motsi Mabuse said before the show there would be no bias towards her sister. But her ‘8’ still helped Oti and Kelvin to top the leaderboar­d

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