Their rugby is such a mess ...that’s what makes France so dangerous
WAleS have won seven of their last eight meetings with France, dating back to their Rugby World Cup semi- final in 2011. What will it mean in Oita on Sunday? Nothing, apparently.
Back in 2006, psychologists identified a condition specifically affecting Japanese tourists on holiday in Paris. Most tended to be young women, of independent means, and single.
The illness would begin with unexplained feelings of disorientation, panic and nausea before settling into deep depression.
The only cure was to return to Japan immediately, often in the company of a nurse supplied by the local embassy.
Paris Syndrome was believed to be caused by a romanticised view of what Paris is, and would be, followed by the shocking let-down when confronted with the reality.
Japan loves its idealised France. Tokyo is home to hundreds of splendid French restaurants, patisseries and cafes; art galleries are stuffed to the ceilings with impressionists. And Paris is seen as France’s epitome; a place of romance and charm. All cobbled streets, elegance and good lighting, like the film Amelie.
The actuality is that Paris is busy and dirty and brusque, and its inhabitants about as receptive to a moonstruck Japanese tourist as they would be to a request for a well-done steak. Cue tears.
French rugby is much the same. You think it is one thing, something else turns up. And not from era to era, either — from tournament to tournament, from game to game — or half to half if one considers the performance against Argentina. French rugby makes no sense. We are used to clubs, to teams, moving through phases. Manchester United were a very good team under Sir Alex Ferguson, and now they are not. Yet French rugby can be Ferguson’s United one day, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer’s the next. This is why at World Cups they are the ultimate wildcard. France have won a lone Six Nations since 2004 and haven’t done the Grand Slam this century, yet they have never failed to get out of the pool stage at a Rugby World Cup and have reached the semi- final or final in six of eight editions. Why? Perhaps because this is the one period in the calendar when French international rugby escapes the grip of its league, when the coaches and players get time together beyond the interference of powerful clubs.
Mourad Boudjellal, outspoken owner of Toulon, may have been telling the players to rise up against their coaches, but they are outside his clutches here.
So, while the usual rumours of dissent in the camp circle — captain Guilhem Guirado (left) is believed to have fallen out with coach Jacques Brunel — France sail on. Warren Gatland might know France’s XV this morning but Wales still have no idea what team they will be facing come Sunday. And that makes France dangerous. Much like Paris, if you go in thinking it’s all moonlight and magic.