WHAT I KNOW ABOUT WOMEN

Tom Cullen, 34, is a Welsh writer, actor and director who played Viscount Gillingham in Downton Abbey. His directorial debut, the film Pink Wall, is out now.

MEN NEED TO STOP AND LISTEN TO THEM MORE

MY MoTHeR, louise osborn, has always been an incredibly independent and ambitious woman.

A theatre director and writer, I found watching her run a rehearsal room, being a leader, very inspiring as a kid. She became someone bigger and more complicated than simply my mother.

work remains her great passion. At 63, she has more vigour and drive than anyone I know.

All week, she works with regional theatre companies in wales, where I grew up. Then at the weekends she teaches acting to young people.

I’ve watched as she jumps around, getting these teenagers — who adore her — excited, and marvelling at how she seems to have more energy than them.

watching her inspired me to become an actor and director, and to create the kind of parts for women that she’s always insisted are so important. Too often, women are cast in reductive, stereotypical roles. Male characters get the space to have contradictory elements: to be ambitious yet still a good parent, to be funny but moody, too. It’s a travesty that women are represented in narrower ways.

How best to rectify that? By listening to all the women in my life — personally and professionally.

My film Pink wall stars Tatiana Maslany. It tells the story of a couple’s struggles with the pressures of gender expectations and human choices.

I wrote the lead part for Tatiana, drawing on many conversations with her and other female friends.

All this translates into my everyday life, too. As men, we’re getting much better at empathising with women, but we’re still always going to be coming at it from a male perspective.

when female friends (sometimes male, too) are having a hard time, I’ll try to find constructive solutions — to fix things, which can be a default male position, when actually what they really want is to feel heard.

I’m finding time to listen to the life stories women have always shared with each other — men must become part of those conversations, too.