All hail Camilla for shining a light on a horror that goes unseen
QUITE a time for those in the top tier of duchess- dom, so let’s have three huzzahs for our girls — namely your Cambridge, your Sussex and your Cornwall.
in a week throbbing with duchessy events, one of them flew on a private jet, one raised awareness of domestic abuse and one stayed firmly in second position by introducing her husband at an event, then leaving him alone to enjoy the solo spotlight.
i know what you’re thinking, but you are wrong. it was Kate on the plane (to visit Northern ireland), Meghan taking a back seat for once, and Camilla who was shining a light on women in trouble.
On Wednesday, the Duchess of Cornwall held a reception at Clarence House to celebrate the 15th anniversary of domestic abuse charity SafeLives. Camilla had met some of the victims two years previously and was moved to tears by the violence they had suffered at the hands of controlling and terrible partners.
in an interview with the Daily Mail, she also revealed how some of her friends had suffered from domestic violence and coercive control.
‘i have known people i suspected it was happening to but they wouldn’t actually talk about it,’ she said. ‘People didn’t talk about it then.
‘ People feel guilty, they feel ashamed, they think it must be their fault. And i think you have to convince them that it is not.’
EXACTLY so. Domestic abuse is often regarded as a workingclass problem, perpetrated by emotionally stunted men in wife-beater vests, full of fury when they return home after a ten-hour shift down t’pit. yet this is far from the case.
‘it affects everybody. it doesn’t matter who you are,’ said the duchess, and she is right.
For such cruelty, like all cruelty, has no class barrier. it oozes through the layers of society like a hidden contagion. And it seems to be getting worse.
Figures released yesterday showed the number of women and girls murdered in england and Wales has increased to its highest level for 14 years. Crime figures from the Office for National Statistics show there were 241 female victims of murder, manslaughter and infanticide in the 12 months to the end of March 2019.
that is 10 per cent higher than in 2018 and the highest total since 2005-06 — shocking proof of a rise in violence against women.
in 38 per cent of the murders of women aged 16 or over, the suspect was their partner or ex-partner, with nearly half (48 per cent) being killed in their homes.
Compare that with only 8 per cent of males in the same age group being killed in a domestic situation and the conclusion is clear to see — many women are not safe in their own homes and not safe from the vicious attentions of the men in their lives. Behind many front doors, quiet lives of bruises, heartache and desperation are being led.
Police forces and community organisations are being trained to look harder for signs of secret abuse, to try to spot the women who are too terrified to speak out. yet even then, justice does not always follow.
Police and prosecutors are often forced to drop cases when victims are reluctant to pursue complaints against their violent partners. understandably so. Help can be hard to find, which is why organisations such as SafeLives are invaluable, providing support for the thousands of female — and male — survivors of domestic abuse.
yes, men can and do suffer from domestic abuse, too. But we all know it is women who suffer most, particularly when it comes to domestic sexual abuse.
THIS is a difficult subject but, if duchesses must do good deeds, then surely this is the kind of goodly deeding they should be doing.
i admire Camilla for making a genuine effort to try to help these victims, for it is not an easy choice.
to be honest, half the time i am not quite sure what duchesses do when they are out and about, smiling like maniacs on official duties.
Meghan popping into a women’s refuge reception area between yoga classes, Kate zooming off in her posh wellies to a farm outside Belfast, where she posed for photographs with a snake? Whassat all about? Sometimes duchess-work is baffling, but not in this instance.
‘i want everybody to make domestic abuse their business. Anyone can be affected by it. there is no dividing line on this,’ said the Duchess of Cornwall. Quite so.