Yes! He failed the First Holiday Test

STEPH SAYS:

I BELIEVE the only way you can really get to know the person you’re dating is by going on a trip together for at least a week. The first holiday is a little like a dress rehearsal for the rest of your relationship. It’s the only way you can get to see behind a carefully curated facade and truly see the person within — so it’s an absolutely essential test.

I am sorry the result has been so disappointing, but it’s far better to know now than in six months’ time. You are 41, which is still young, but not so young if you hope to meet-marry-and-mate.

If children are a priority for you, you haven’t time to waste. And if children are not on your radar, well, you still don’t have time to waste! none of us does. Life is too short to spend with someone who is rude to people.

Which brings me to an important point. You talk about your boyfriend shouting at staff. The answer to your queston is right there.

should you break off your relationship with someone who is rude to other people? Yes! Of course. If he is unkind to others, he will be unkind to you. And how could you have respect for someone who behaves like that?

good manners are important and someone who lacks them is not worth your time. so without a doubt I think you should move on. Then you should analyse what you have learned about yourself and who you want to be with in the future.

You may have made a mistake by compromising so much on the hotel. I understand why you did, but at least you know what you want from a holiday — even if you have yet to decide what you want from a man! I am guessing that you work hard and if you want a week of being pampered and can afford it, then that’s what you should do.

We must all pick our battles in relationships, but going on a holiday you know you won’t like is never going to end well, so it’s worth fighting for what you want.

I think it’s time to be honest with your partner, so I would arrange to go out for a drink somewhere quiet.

Be brave, kind and courteous. Tell him you don’t see a future together with him.

You both know the trip was a disaster, but you must be the one who is brave enough to call it. Explain to him that after your experience together, it is obvious you are incompatible.

Holidays are supposed to be one of the highlights of our lives. Why spend the rest of yours with someone who makes you — and others — miserable? Let him down gently and book your next holiday immediately!