Ephraim Hardcastle
LIBBY Purves receives a round-robin herogram from BBC managing director Bob Shennan describing her as one of the frontline presenters people will turn to in coming weeks. Her response? ‘The buggers sacked me three years ago!’ Many still wonder why Radio 4’s Midweek, which Libby presented for 33 years, was axed in 2017.
AMIDST national crisis, Jemima Goldsmith shares her domestic plight, tweeting: ‘Perfect time for my central heating and boiler to fail.’ She adds: ‘Oh... and a power cut. And a shrieking alarm.’ Deep breaths, dear...
BBC diplomatic correspondent and Old Etonian James Landale hastily backtracks on his tweet: ‘Surely the most iconic book about self-isolation is The Diary of A Young Girl by Anne Frank?’ Later, he adds: ‘Forgive me, I am sorry, this was clumsy. I was of course not comparing coronavirus to the Holocaust, or selfisolation to fleeing the Nazis. I was merely noting how much of the book is about the pressure of domestic confinement and not just the fear of discovery and so on...’ Stop digging James!
DAME Judi Dench, pictured, does her bit for the virus war effort with a home video encouraging hand washing while reciting The Owl and the Pussy-Cat and finishing with a theatrical purr. Considering the film Cats is probably the biggest flop of her illustrious career, Judi’s sense of humour remains undiminished at this difficult time.
FEVERISHLY promoting her new memoir, Rachel Johnson tells Sky News of her unfortunate habit of coming off second best to battleaxe Ann Widdecombe, who won a Brexit Party seat in last year’s European elections while Change UK’s Rachel lost. Previously, Widdecombe fared considerably better when they both appeared on TV’s Celebrity Big Brother. ‘She’s my nemesis,’ wails Rachel. ‘Whenever she’s in the frame, I know I’m a gonner.’
PAYING tribute to the late Roy Hudd, The Stage recalls his role as Coronation Street undertaker Archie Shuttleworth officiating at the funeral of butcher Fred Elliott, played by John Savident. ‘Filming was brought to a dramatic halt when Hudd suffered a minor heart attack,’ reports the paper. ‘Savident, realising Hudd was in pain, jumped from the coffin to assist his fellow actor.’
DANIEL Craig tells Saga magazine that as a child he dreamed not of playing James Bond, but starring as the Invisible Man, adding of fans who recognize him: ‘Sometimes people are staring in sheer disbelief.’ Wouldn’t occur, Daniel, if you were the Invisible Man!
THE new Tory MP for Hastings and Rye, Sally-Ann Hart, pays tribute to her predecessor, Amber Rudd. ‘Amber was particularly proud of her Arse,’ declares Hart, to a certain amount of eye-bulging from the Commons chamber. Only after a pause did she explain that this was a reference to a local commuter rail service known as the Amber Rudd Seaside Express.