Only a lockdown will fix my fears

DEAR BEL,

I HAVE a 91-year-old mother, an 81-year-old husband, an 18-month granddaughter from my daughter and a two-and-ahalfyear-old granddaughter from my son.

My daughter’s little girl goes to nursery where there has just been a case of Covid confirmed with one of the older children.

The nursery is still open for the younger children so my daughter intends to keep sending her daughter. I usually have each granddaughter separately once a week and also see my mother.

But as my daughter is not working, I feel she should take my granddaughter out of nursery for the time being, especially as she is expecting another baby soon. In addition, my daughterin-law is also expecting and worries about the girls mixing.

I’m piggy-in-the-middle and quite frankly would welcome another lockdown. CAROLINE

OBVIOUSLY people have very strong feelings about Covid, lockdown, and the whole damn thing. When (a few weeks ago) i questioned the ‘rule of six’ re Christmas, i got into trouble with certain readers, who objected to my independence of mind.

What i’d do and what you choose to do may be very different, yet each of us is entitled (i firmly believe) to that choice.

Recently i received a sad letter from a grandmother who hasn’t seen her grandchildren since the beginning of lockdown — ‘to protect me’. so post lockdown she still chose (solely because of age) to shield herself — even though that meant choosing to be unhappy.

For me (just turned 74) that would be inconceivable. My mother (96) feels the same. We both choose being with family over ‘ protection’ — and frankly, nobody tells either of us what to do within our homes.

Having said that, i believe you have every right to tell your daughters what you think, without waiting for any politician to issue instructions on new lockdowns.

if you think your granddaughter should leave nursery, and that if she doesn’t you can no longer take care of her, then your daughter should take that on board and respect your considered choice.

if your chief concern right now is to shield your husband and mother, then both your daughters should listen to your wishes. They may think you are being unduly worried and over-careful, but i believe they should honour and help — not add to the worry.