If Kanye’s chilly, spare a thought for his missus . . .
The weather has been particularly nippy these past few days, even with the sun shining. Small wonder, then, that Kanye West insisted on wrapping up well. But did he overdo it?
he spent most of last week out and about in Paris covered by a big black anorak with a black hood, baggy black trousers, black Spandex gloves and black shoes.
A lot of the time, he also wore a black all- over face mask, like a balaclava, but without the holes for the eyes and mouth. The whole outfit gave him the look of a gigantic full stop. Wisely, he went everywhere with bodyguards, who would have been on hand to stop him bumping into lamp- posts, or being mistaken for a refuse sack and thrown into the back of a lorry by street cleaners.
The 46-year- old Kanye — now legally known as ‘Ye’ — was accompanied everywhere by his striking young wife, a 29year-old Australian architect who goes by the equally unlikely name of Bianca Censori.
Unlike her husband, Bianca must have felt the cold, as she kept setting off on their shopping expeditions without a woolly jumper. Instead, she wore a cropped jacket with virtually nothing on below. She gamely made do with a pair of see-through tights and not much else. had her luggage gone astray at the airport? These things happen.
They were staying at the Paris Ritz, which is usually a stickler for correct clothing, but clearly turned a blind eye. Money talks, but fame talks louder.
On its website, the hotel insists that ‘a smart dress code is required at the Ritz Paris, and elegant shorts are only allowed in our restaurants until 6pm’. Of course, this is badly worded: at the stroke of 6pm, a pedant would insist on changing into a scruffy pair of shorts.
Fortunately, the restaurant dress code has nothing to say about allover headgear, so Kanye would have been permitted to dine with his mask on. how he managed to get the food into his mouth is another question. Perhaps the maitre d’ provided him with a thin straw, which he could then squeeze between the thin mesh of his mask and into his mouth, though this would preclude anything more substantial than cucumber soup or a glass of water.
At least Bianca, now safely out of the cold, would have experienced no such trouble, and could have had a good tuck-in. But they must have looked an odd couple in the posh dining room, Kanye done up like a dustbin bag and Bianca in little but her birthday suit.
What did they talk about? Kanye is a forbidding presence at the best of times, and no good at small talk. I wonder if his new $850,000 (£675,000) titanium dentures are playing up? People say he now speaks with a lisp, like Daffy Duck, so perhaps his mask gives him an excuse to say nothing.
Bianca’s week was conscientiously chronicled by the paparazzi, who followed her and her husband from one expensive boutique to another, as they pursued their fruitless search for something for her to wear.
‘Bianca Censori put on an X-rated display by wearing no underwear with see-through stockings while the couple were out in Paris on Tuesday,’ ran one report. ‘ She did not attempt to hide her bare backside or her exposed private areas.’ Not since the heyday of Albert Speer has a young architect received so much attention.
BUT, sadly, not everyone appreciates the sight of a near- naked young lady. Killjoys in Paris are seeking to invoke a law that states ‘deliberate sexual display . . . in a place accessible to the public gaze is punishable by one year in prison’.
Reports suggest Bianca’s father, Leo, blames Kanye West’s controlling ways for his daughter’s immodesty. he is said to want ‘a proper sit down’ with Kanye.
By all accounts, the Censori family is not to be trifled with: Leo has convictions for importing heroin and possession of a pistol. One of his brothers has convictions for violence, assaulting police, theft and threats, and another brother was once convicted of murder. Ooh-er.
If I were Kanye, I would be saving up to buy my wife a Laura Ashley dress for her next birthday, and I might even swap my all-over black face mask for something a little less threatening, like a paper hat.