Horror show in the Himalayas
Most shocking batting collapse of the tour by Stokes’s stumblers gives them a mountain to climb
The thousands of england supporters who have flocked here for this bucket-list Test were best advised to enjoy the stunning view of the snow- capped himalayan mountains. The only alternative was to watch an absolute horror show.
This was the most desperate day yet of a tour on which england have promised much but delivered maddeningly little. Worse than when they crashed to a record defeat in Rajkot and worse even than when they threw it all away in Ranchi.
They had talked of not being in the ‘departure lounge’ ahead of this final Test and insisted they were not going to think of home until they had done all they could to finish with a victory that would give them a more acceptable 3-2 loss.
But the way they batted suggested england had packed their bags, checked in and were heading for the Dharamshala hills clutching their boarding passes, because they again threw away a position of considerable strength on the first day here.
england started so well, too, winning the toss on what looked like a belter of a pitch and overcoming a seriously skilful opening burst from Jasprit Bumrah and Mohammed Siraj that tested Zak Crawley and Ben Duckett to the limit.
Both of them had done what openers traditionally do, showing resilience in coping with considerable movement off the seam on a chilly but dry morning at high altitude, one leg cutter from Bumrah to Crawley at 87 miles per hour doing everything but get him out.
Then, with the hard work done and england on 100 for one in the last over before lunch, only Duckett falling and that to a brilliant catch by Shubman Gill, what did they do? Collapse spectacularly, that’s what, just as they have done in the last four Tests in India.
Yes, India’s spinners were superb, starting when Kuldeep Yadav forced a loose shot from Duckett to take the first of his five wickets in a 15- over spell, but england gave it away far too easily. They were soft and a long way removed from their Bazball best.
It is not difficult to see where england have lost this series. The batting, particularly from the middle order, has simply not been good enough.
In the second Test in Visakhapatnam, after going 1-0 up in hyderabad, they lost seven for 43. In Rajkot, they lost seven for 35, and in Ranchi, all 10 for 107. Now, from this position where they could and should have gone on to a formidable score to put pressure on India, they did it again, losing seven for 43 in 14.1 overs and nine for 139 in all.
It is no way to win any Test and certainly not one in India, where big runs matter more than anywhere.
Assistant coach Marcus Trescothick, 48, who started the day being named as an unlikely official fielding substitute along with Paul Collingwood, 47, as england were down to 13 fit players, denied there was any scarring among england’s batsmen at the end of a long series but they are playing the spin of Yadav, in particular, worse than at any time on the tour.
Only Crawley could be in any way excused but even he fell short of three figures again after making his fourth half century of the series and his eighth score of 50-plus since the start of last summer. Otherwise, it was a familiar story of batting underachievement.
The demise started when Ollie Pope inexplicably ran down the pitch at Yadav on the stroke of lunch and was done in the flight by the left-arm wrist spinner’s googly that turned away from the right-hander. he had started less frenetically, too, before a total brain-fade. But it was after the interval that england really imploded. Crawley, the only england batsman to average more than 40 in this series, was bowled through the gate by one from Yadav that turned substantially.
That brought Jonny Bairstow to the crease in his 100th Test. The stage was set for a Bairstow special on a day which started with an emotional presentation to him of a commemorative cap by Joe Root in front of his proud family.
he had that look in his eyes and, for a while, as he smashed Yadav for two sixes that took him past 6,000 Test runs, it did look as if we were in for something to match the occasion. Sadly, it was to become another story of what might have been.
After surviving a hard caught and bowled chance to Yadav on 21, Bairstow got a faint edge to start the worst spell of the lot, the three wickets of Bairstow, Root and Ben Stokes falling without addition to the score in 13 balls and with all three burning england’s reviews.
Root, the key man but so disappointing in this series apart from when scoring that one century in the fourth Test, was undone by a clever piece of bowling from Ravindra Jadeja, who turned one away from him and then sent the next one straight on to his pads.
But Stokes, unusually, has not learned from his struggles on this tour. Repeatedly he has gone back to spin and been, if anything, over- cautious at the start of his innings and repeatedly he has got out cheaply. This was no exception, to another Yadav googly.
Ben Foakes did his best to be more expansive with the tail but england were way, way below par when they were bowled out for 218, the unsung Yadav proving the pick of the attack again and Ravichandran Ashwin ending with four wickets in his own 100th Test.
Predictably, India put the conditions into perspective. It looked like Jimmy Anderson had taken his 699th Test wicket when umpire Joel Wilson, who had a good day, gave Rohit Sharma out on 20 but the review showed he had missed the ball.
Then Yashasvi Jaiswal hit Shoaib Bashir for three sixes in his first over, became the highest runscorer for India in any series against england and passed 1,000 runs in just his ninth Test. he was stumped for 57 giving Bashir the charge again as India finished on 135 for one, just 83 behind, but a red-ball star has been born for India.
england, meanwhile, were indefensible, however much they have thrilled in the last two years and however much logic there was in Stokes’s pre-Test insistence that his players have improved here despite the series loss.
The scoreline already looks like it is going to be 4-1, unless england can pull off another miracle. And, really, it is hard to justify that being anything other than the same old story when they play in India.