Top rider’s despair over spinal injury ‘led to her assisted suicide’ at 31
A HORSE riding star left behind a heartbreaking letter before she apparently died in an assisted suicide after suffering a devastating spine injury in a fall. Caroline March, 31, had been knocked unconscious during a crosscountry event in April 2022 and her injuries left her unable to do ‘anything and everything’ she had loved.
she told why she wanted to end her life in a poignant public facebook message, saying: ‘No one can truly understand what I have to go through.’
Ms March, of Colchester, revealed her despair as she ‘hates asking for help’ and had previously thrived on ‘adrenaline hits and spontaneity’.
The former professional rider, whose death was announced on saturday, began her letter: ‘Where to even start writing this.
‘Ideally I’d like to say nothing at all because the people who I care about know but of course everyone will have an opinion. I’ve never understood society’s obsession with longevity and the need to live for as long as possible.
Assisted suicide is always something I believed in and have always said that if anything happened and I was forced into the predicament that I couldn’t have the quality of life I wanted, that would be the route I’d take.
‘Not going to lie, never imagined it would come to fruition but here we are. I could keep going but it’s a decision which is the best route for me.
‘No one can truly understand what I have to go through. My utmost respect for anyone who hasn’t only made a life after injury but has flourished.’
Ms March told of longing to be a mother, saying: ‘All I ever wanted was a family and I’d have given up everything in an instant for one. Two/three little sprogs running round the family farm. I really wanted to be a young mum and I’d have been a good one.’
she had been an eventer up to four-star level but had to give up after her fall at Burnham Market, Norfolk, despite having successful surgery on a fractured vertebrae. she wrote: ‘There is a lot of new treatments. for anyone else’s sake, I hope it continues so my projected future isn’t the same for everyone.
‘It’s not an existence I want. The bowel and bladder regime, sexual function, the entire impossibility to do anything and everything that I love.
‘I have felt so much love from so many people the last few years. I just wish love could fix it or even make it bearable but it can’t.
‘A characteristic that used to be my strength is now my downfall. I’m so stubborn and determined, I have to be good at everything I do. Life is cruel, really cruel.’
Her death was revealed online by Eventing News, which wrote: ‘It’s with heavy hearts that we share the news of Caroline March’s passing.
‘Caroline was well-known and loved throughout the British eventing community for her big personality and fiery streak, and a zest for the things that she loved that saw her accomplish much in her three decades.
‘After a career-ending injury, she fought to find new ways to chase joy and purpose.
‘Caroline’s passing – a dignified end to her life that she was able to choose for herself – will be mourned by a wide array people fortunate to count themselves among her friends and family.’
Public debate around assisted dying has increased in recent months after Dame Esther rantzen, who has stage four lung cancer, revealed last year that she has signed up to the Dignitas clinic in switzerland.
Under the current law in England, Wales and Northern Ireland, assisting suicide is punishable by up to 14 years in prison.
For confidential support, call Samaritans on 116 123, visit samaritans.org or visit www.thecalmzone.net/get-support
‘A decision which is best route for me’