ADDICTED TO ONLINE PORN MODEL AT 70

Dear Coleen

I am a married man of 70 and I’m infatuated with an online porn model, who I have masturbated to online, written to, and sent letters and small gifts to. She is nice to me, but expensive at £5 per minute. I have been married for 40 years, but not had sex with my wife for 25 of those years. I imagine a life with this lady if I survived my wife (who is 77), but she is obviously wealthier than I am. I realise what a rat I seem but still love my wife and don’t want to hurt her. Please help – how do I break this cycle?

Coleen says

Of course this woman is far wealthier than you – she’s charging £5 a minute! You need to realise this woman is a pro – this is her job and she will not be interested in a relationship with you now or in the future. These women are known as rinsers – they rinse men like yourself for money as well as gifts, and make an absolute fortune. She won’t have any feelings for you. I totally get that you’re frustrated if you haven’t had sex for 25 years, but there are other ways of getting sexual pleasure without bankrupting yourself. You do sound as if you’re becoming addicted to this woman and you certainly have unrealistic expectations. My advice would be to go cold turkey – don’t contact her again and if she has your details, block her numbers. If you’re feeling vulnerable, don’t put yourself in a situation where you might go online and speak to her. If you’re worried you might, remove yourself from temptation – go out, meet a friend for a drink etc. But don’t risk losing everything you’ve worked for all your life for this woman.