MENOPAUSE HAS RUINED OUR SEX LIFE

Dear Coleen

My wife and I have been together for 20 years and have a very good relationship. We rarely argue and love doing the same things, but we used to have sex several times a week and now we’re lucky if it’s once a fortnight.

She started going through the menopause about a year ago, which I know has been challenging for her, and one of the side-effects has been that her sex drive is these days virtually nonexistent.

I really want us to get back to enjoying the physical side of our relationship.

Have you any thoughts or advice?

Coleen says

It’s quite normal for a woman to have a dip in her sex drive around the menopause. On the positive side, everything else about your relationship sounds great and you also seem to be able to talk about things openly. So, yes, I think you can get back to where you were, but you might just need a bit of help with it.

Treating menopausal symptoms has come a long way in recent years, so try to encourage her to see her GP or a gynaecologist who can prescribe medication to restore hormone levels and help with sex drive, and also improve her energy and mood.

Her attitude to sex is nothing to do with how she feels about you, so don’t let any insecurities you may have about the situation get out of hand, because that will just put more pressure on her.